Impeachment Inquiry: How to Defend a Guilty Client

I feel like I’m in a mini law school course here. Here’s what I’ve learned: If you know your client is guilty –
1) Try to besmirch the reputations of the witnesses to the crime. This includes ridiculing a military man for wearing his uniform to the court.
2) Try to make it look like the witnesses don’t agree on what they witnessed – even though they both describe witnessing the same things – by pointing out that one witness used the word “demand” in his description, while the other witness did not.
3) Try to pull the focus off the actual crime. Use “red herrings.” This includes focusing on one word (like, for instance, “bribery”) and noting that none of the witnesses have used this one word in describing what they saw.
4) Make it look like a personal attack. Say the only reason this inquiry is taking place is because the people asking questions don’t like your client. (Ignore the fact that your client was caught committing the offense.)
5) Try to ridicule the whole process. Call it a circus. Call it a farce. Belittle the importance of the process and infer it is a waste of everyone’s time.
6) Talk about the millions of people who voted for your client. Infer that popularity is more important than truth. (Caveat: Do not talk about the millions of people who do not support your client. Do not talk about election interference by Russia that may have won the election for your client.)
7) Spin it. If your client is accused, for instance, of trying to get a foreign government to find dirt on his political rival in exchange for weapons paid for by tax-payer dollars – spin it so that your client looks honorable – like he was only trying to get rid of corruption. Never mind that your client showed no interest in learning about the corruption in this foreign government, or that the foreign government had already been cleared by United States intelligence. (“The Pentagon in May officially certified that it had seen enough anti-corruption progress to justify releasing the congressionally authorized aid, according to documents provided to The Associated Press.” Military Times, 9/29/19.)

Feel free to add on anything YOU have learned from the impeachment inquiry about defending a guilty client. 

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