Ramblings on the anniversary of Dad’s death:

It’s been five and eight now –
five years since Dad
and eight years since Mom.
And I’m still here,
still moving along,
surviving without them near
to guide and advise and bolster.

And, for me, this seems remarkable
because I’m really still just a little kid
in spite of my gray hair,
and being a wife and a mom
and a grandma myself,
and a many-yeared career.
It amazes me that
I’ve made it this far
without Mom and Dad to guide me.

But they gave me tools
to survive without them –
Dad brought me into the mountains
and showed me how strong I am
and how brave.
Mom showed me how to use Love
to heal myself and the world.
And they both showed me
how to laugh when life gets absurd.
I’m so grateful to them
for these tools – these gifts.

Today when I think about them
and feel their love for me,
I will recognize my tears
for what they really are –
tears of gratitude;
tears of recognition
of Life that never ends.
– Karen Molenaar Terrell