Using My Highly-Honed Detective Skills

There are all these TV shows where there are detectives and body guards and lawyers who are constantly on the alert for suspicious activity – I enjoy these shows. Sometimes I try to imagine myself as an observant detective, myself. So, at the supermarket this morning, I decided to observe – only I decided to look for evidence of good things.

As I stood at the end of a long line at the cash register I had a lot of time to observe. I saw cashiers who were friendly and efficient. I saw people smiling at each other, and making room for other customers to go around them. And in front of me in line I saw a little boy sitting in the shopping cart, reaching up to hug his mom. Oh, it was so sweet and beautiful – that little hug. I felt my heart melting at the sweetness of it. I leaned in and told the young mother that I was a mother of sons, too, and that I remember those precious moments when my sons were little.

Then the little boy got out of the cart and turned to me. He had important things to say to me. He pointed to the Oreo cookies in the shopping cart and told me these were his favorite type of cookies. I told him they were mine, too! So we talked for a bit about the wonder of Oreo cookies and the proper way to eat them. Then the little boy pointed to the primroses in my cart and told me that they were pretty. I asked him which one of the primroses was his favorite, and he said he liked the pink one best. He told me his name was “Benjamin” and said something I didn’t quite catch about “Georgia.”

By this time, his mom’s groceries were all packed up and they were ready to go. I thanked Benjamin for chatting with me, and he said, “Good bye!” and waved at me.

I was so tickled by this happy exchange with young Benjamin.

My highly-honed detective skills helped me find just what I needed this morning.

-Karen Molenaar Terrell

Cosmic Hug

Trust.
Feel the arms of Love
enfolding us
all in one universal
cosmic hug.
Feel the pull,
the tug
towards Truth, Life, Soul,
Love
gathering us together,
breaking the fetters,
cutting the tethers
that keep us bound
in hate and fear.
We’re free in Love
right now, right here.
-Karen Molenaar Terrell

Blue Cosmos (photo by Karen Molenaar Terrell)

A Holy and Beautiful Thing

On this day six years ago – and it was a Monday then, too – my mom was brought by ambulance to our home to begin hospice. We weren’t sure how much time we had left with Mom. I wasn’t sure how we were going to make this work – Scott and I were still working full-time then and we planned on taking turns caring for Mom, but we hadn’t, exactly, figured out when we were going to sleep. We just threw ourselves into this and trusted that it would all work out. We didn’t want Mom to be brought from the hospital to an institution where she’d be surrounded by strangers. We wanted her here with us. It felt right.

Mom and I spent the day telling each other how much we loved each other. At one point she became very tired – too tired to talk – but I was greedy and asked her, once again, if she loved me. Her eyes fastened on me and the look she gave me was pure love- I still see that look in her eyes at times when I need to remember her love.

I went to bed at 9:00 to sleep for a few hours while Scott took the first shift. I’d just fallen asleep when Scott came up to the bedroom to tell me that Mom wanted to talk to me.

I came downstairs and saw Mom sitting up from the hospital bed with a grin on her face. She looked all excited, like she was going to a party or something. I explained to her that I was going to sleep for a little bit, but that I’d come down to be with her at midnight. I told her she wasn’t going to be alone. One of us was going to be with her all the time. She grinned and said, “Okay!”

When I came down at midnight, Moz was sleeping. I gave her some medication when I first came down and some more an hour and half later. I stretched out on the couch next to Mom’s hospital bed to rest a little. About 3:00 in the morning I had this beautiful dream of green fields and rolling hills and butterflies – my dream was full of joy. And I felt something brush by me – touch me – and I felt love and peace as this presence brushed by me.

I woke up then. Mom wasn’t struggling to breathe and I thought, “Oh, I don’t need to give her any medication.” I started to go back to sleep and then… I realized. I got up and felt her and she was starting to feel cool. I went upstairs and got Scott and told him I thought Moz had passed. But I wasn’t sure. There’s such a thin veil between this life and whatever comes after. Scott came down and felt her pulse and told me, “Moz is gone, Sweetie.”

We called hospice, and a nurse came out and talked us through what happened next. I’ll be forever grateful to Hospice of the Northwest for their help through this process.

Moz’s passing was one of the most holy and beautiful things I’ve ever experienced. I’m so grateful that we brought her into our home that last day.
-Karen Molenaar Terrell

(Pictured below: Mom and Einstein.)

Moz and Einstein.

Better Than Okay

better than okay
pain-free and at peace; resting
in Love. All is well
-Karen Molenaar Terrell

“Become conscious for a single moment that Life and intelligence are purely spiritual, – neither in nor of matter, – and the body will then utter no complaints.”
-Mary Baker Eddy (Science and Health, p. 14)

Nothing Can Stop the Joy

inside the twirling house
in Wizard of Oz
tilting and spinning around in circles
without a pause
scared and alone in the dark
the walls and floorboards
creaking and popping
and then suddenly
I’m bopping and hopping
to Alison Krauss’s rendition
of “I Will” in an irredescent bubble
of joy and peace
floating above the troubled rubble
until it gets smaller and smaller
and disappears into the nothing it is
and I see all there is,
or ever has been, is Love,
and nothing can stop the joy
-Karen Molenaar Terrell

Readings on Heart

Luke 4: 14
And Jesus returned in the power of the Spirit into Galilee: and there went out a fame of him through all the region round about.

Luke 8: 1, 4-15
And when much people were gathered together, and were come to him out of every city, he spake by a parable:

A sower went out to sow his seed: and as he sowed, some fell by the way side; and it was trodden down, and the fowls of the air devoured it.

And some fell upon a rock; and as soon as it was sprung up, it withered away, because it lacked moisture.

And some fell among thorns; and the thorns sprang up with it, and choked it.

And other fell on good ground, and sprang up, and bare fruit an hundredfold. And when he had said these things, he cried, He that hath ears to hear, let him hear.

And his disciples asked him, saying, What might this parable be?

10 And he said, Unto you it is given to know the mysteries of the kingdom of God: but to others in parables; that seeing they might not see, and hearing they might not understand.

11 Now the parable is this: The seed is the word of God.

12 Those by the way side are they that hear; then cometh the devil, and taketh away the word out of their hearts, lest they should believe and be saved.

13 They on the rock are they, which, when they hear, receive the word with joy; and these have no root, which for a while believe, and in time of temptation fall away.

14 And that which fell among thorns are they, which, when they have heard, go forth, and are choked with cares and riches and pleasures of this life, and bring no fruit to perfection.

15 But that on the good ground are they, which in an honest and good heart, having heard the word, keep it, and bring forth fruit with patience.

Proverbs 23:7
For as he thinketh in his heart, so is he…

Matthew 5:8
Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.

Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures by Mary Baker Eddy

Heart: Mortal feelings, motives, affections, joys, and sorrows. (587: 23)

Man walks in the direction towards which he looks, and where his treasure is, there will his heart be also. (451:14-16)

We should examine ourselves and learn what is the affection and purpose of the heart, for in this way only can we learn what we honestly are. (8:28)

Jesus prayed; he withdrew from the material senses to refresh his heart with brighter, with spiritual views. (32:25)

Through spiritual sense you can discern the heart of divinity, and thus begin to comprehend in Science the generic term man. (258:31)

Who that has felt the loss of human peace has not gained stronger desires for spiritual joy? The aspiration after heavenly good comes even before we discover what belongs to wisdom and Love. The loss of earthly hopes and pleasures brightens the ascending path of many a heart. (265:23-28)

Human affection is not poured forth vainly, even though it meet no return. Love enriches the nature, enlarging, purifying, and elevating it. The wintry blasts of earth may uproot the flowers of affection, and scatter them to the winds; but this severance of fleshly ties serves to unite thought more closely to God, for Love supports the struggling heart until it ceases to sigh over the world and begins to unfold its wings for heaven. (57:22)

The vital part, the heart and soul of Christian Science, is Love. (113:5-6)

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Or Alternatively

I want to hibernate – just go to sleep
until we’re all together again –
only be awake for those moments
when you’re all near.
Maybe I can function while I sleep –
look like I’m awake and appear
to do all the things that society
requires of me – until your return.

Or…

Alternatively, I could fill those waiting
moments with love and joy –
I might as well, right?
And then when we all meet again
one day around the family table
I’ll have something valuable
to share – I’ll be ready and able.

-Karen Molenaar Terrell

Stockpiling Memories

Storing away memories
like a squirrel stores nuts
before the winter cuts in
They’re leaving soon
so I’m storing fast
gathering memories
before they pass
Walks around the block
as we laugh and talk
steaming tea in our favorite mugs
curry soup and extra long hugs
I tuck these memories
into the safe places
in my heart –
stockpiling the memories
for when we’re apart

-Karen Molenaar Terrell

“We think of an absent friend as easily as we do of one present.”
-Mary Baker Eddy

For I Am Persuaded that…

For I am persuaded that
neither times of the month
nor times of the year;
neither astrological signs,
nor doubts, nor fear;
neither what’s far away,
nor what lies near;
neither what’s in the past,
nor what’s now and here;
neither war nor pandemic,
nor loss nor tears
can separate us from Love
and all that’s dear.

-Karen Molenaar Terrell



We Are the Children of Love

Love is All. Love is all presence – fills all space. The only Power and Presence. Eternal. Infinite. The Only. “There is no spot where Love is not.”

We are the reflections, expressions, manifestations, creations, ideas, children of Love. Love is our Source. Love is our Cause and we are Love’s effects. We belong wholly to Love. There isn’t the teeniest, tiniest part of us that is unlike our Source, our Father-Mother. All we can be is what Love made us to be.

The belief that we can be diseased is a lie, for disease is no part of Love, our Source. The belief that we are fragile and weak is a lie, for we are the image and likeness of All-Power. The belief that there was EVER a moment when we were outside Love – unprotected, vulnerable – is a lie, for we are never, have never been, will never be, separated from Love – not in the past, present, or future. The belief that we can be separated from Life, Love, Truth is a lie, for we were created by Life, Love, and Truth. God is our Life – never-ending and eternal.

Joy! Peace! Unfaltering hope, fearless and confident, strong and invincible be-ing is ours to claim right now.

-Karen Molenaar Terrell