Waking from the Dream

Yesterday I awoke in the middle of the night from a dream filled with terrible guilt over some vague-ish transgression I’d committed in France. I reminded myself I’ve never been to France, and went back to sleep.

I realized there was some metaphysical profundity in that dream, though, and later – when I was up and about – pondered the dream some more.

In Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, Mary Baker Eddy has a lot to say about dreams. “Mortal existence is a dream…” she writes, and “Whatever indicates the fall of man or the opposite of God or God’s absence, is the Adam-dream, which is neither Mind nor man, for it is not begotten of the Father.”

The belief that we’re born in guilt, living in guilt, that our moments and hours and days – even our dreams – should be filled with guilt, is a boatload of balderdash, a heap of rubbish, a 20 foot-long baloney sandwich. It is, I believe, the cause of a lot of grief and wasted time for humanity.

I really like what Edward A. Kimball has to say about self-condemnation in his book, Lectures and Articles on Christian Science. He writes, “It won’t do you a particle of good to enter upon a career of self-condemnation. Remorse never got anybody into heaven. A sense of regret and all that sort of thing is not the process. The process is reform; it is change; it is correction…”

And the late great Ethel Waters said, “I am somebody cause God don’t make no junk.” We are all, I believe, the sons and daughters of Love – worthy of everything good and joyful the universe has to offer. Love don’t make no guilt-ridden junk.

(Ahem. The following needs to be read in a revival meeting kind of voice to get the full effect): Rise up, my brothers and sisters! Wake up and rise, I say! For you are free-born and worthy and guilt-free! Allelujah and amen and pass the joy.

snowgeese in flight contrast

snowgeese in flight (photo by Karen Molenaar Terrell)

 

 

But Wait! There’s More! :)

I had so much fun working on the project for the Reading Room (see last post) that I couldn’t stop. 🙂 Here are seven more photos for the display. Quotes by Mary Baker Eddy, photos by Karen Molenaar Terrell:

Throughout All Time and Space

“The divine Spirit, which identified Jesus thus centuries ago, has spoken through the inspired Word and will speak through it in every age and clime. It is revealed to the receptive heart, and is again seen casting out evil and healing the sick.”
– Mary Baker Eddy

“This healing power of Truth must have been far anterior to the period in which Jesus lived. It is as ancient as ‘the Ancient of days.’ It lives through all Life, and extends throughout all space.”
– Mary Baker Eddy

I love looking out at the stars on a clear night, knowing that the starlight that’s reaching me now may have started out from some of those stars thousands of years ago. My new favorite star is Sirius – the light from Sirius takes eight years to reach Earth. That means the light I’m seeing from Sirius started eight years ago – when I was in the midst of a personal crisis I thought might never end. I find comfort somehow in knowing that, even then, Sirius was shining its light on me. When I look up at the stars I feel myself connected to something – a presence and power – far bigger than the little speck of the universe known as Earth. I feel myself connected to Life that’s infinite and fills all space. 

Okay, at the risk of being placed in the “tinfoil hat” category, I’m going to go ahead and say it: I do not believe Life is confined to this planet, or the three and half to four billion years that scientists believe life has been on Earth. I believe Life to be eternal and infinite – without beginning or end, or boundaries. “God forms and peoples the universe,” Mary Baker Eddy writes in Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures  – and my thoughts about the universe coincide with her thoughts there.

There are some who believe, I guess, that the healings – what they would call “miracles” – that happened in Jesus’ time were only for that time and place in the universe, and can’t be repeated. But Eddy writes: “Jesus’ promise is perpetual…The purpose of his great life-work extends through time and includes universal humanity. Its Principle is infinite, reaching beyond the pale of a single period or of a limited following.” She writes: “The time for the reappearing of the divine healing is throughout all time…”

I like the idea that we’re not separated from the rest of the universe  – that we’re not separated by time or space from the healing power of God – Love and Truth and Life. I like the idea that this healing power of Love is perpetual, on-going, ever-present, without limits or bounds, and ever available to us. And I REALLY like the idea that there are other expressions of life peopling the universe.  When I look up at the stars, I send out my love to the other expressions of life that might be out there, with the hope that my love will carry through time and space.

It is my belief that the healing power of Love and Truth will, as mankind progresses onward, eventually be seen as the only real power. 

“The periods of spiritual ascension are the days and seasons of Mind’s creation, in which beauty, sublimity, purity, and holiness – yea, the divine nature – appear in man and the universe never to disappear.”
– Mary Baker Eddy

NASA image of Sirius:

“Evil is not supreme; good is not helpless…”

 “Your influence for good depends upon the weight you throw into the right scale. The good you do and embody gives you the only power obtainable. Evil is not power. It is a mockery of strength, which erelong betrays its weakness and falls, never to rise.”
– Mary Baker Eddy

 “Evil is not supreme; good is not helpless…”
– Mary Baker Eddy

After watching this videoclip from the Young Turks on Facebook – a clip from a Donald Trump political rally – I’ve been feeling really discouraged about mankind. As Cenk Uygur, the commentator, says: “If you think this isn’t dangerous, then you’re not paying attention.” In the clip we see the mob inside the rally hall applauding as people are bullied and threatened, hated on, and thrown out – the mob getting more and more excited and frenzied as the rally goes on. The blood lust and excitement we see in the crowd towards the victims of this hatred is incredibly disturbing. When did it become acceptable, in America, to treat each other with such brazen, unapologetic mean-ness? When did people in our society lose their civility and courtesy to one another? When did it become popular and “cool” to be hateful?

I’m grappling with how I, personally, should respond to what I see in this videoclip. I’m thinking it through as I type this… so… yeah… this may not be the most articulate post you’ve ever read…

It seems to me that to ignore the behavior we see in that video – to just close our eyes and stop up our ears and pretend it’s not happening – is not going to make it go away. It needs to be unmasked, exposed, and seen for what it is – senseless and hateful and dishonorable. The hatred needs to be condemned. Mary Baker Eddy writes in Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures: “Evil which obtains in the bodily senses, but which the heart condemns, has no foundation; but if evil is uncondemned, it is undenied and nurtured. Under such circumstances, to say that there is no evil, is an evil in itself. When needed tell the truth concerning the lie. Evasion of Truth cripples integrity, and casts thee down from the pinnacle.”

Whoaaaah, right?

But I don’t want to be a part of perpetuating the cycle of hatred, either. I don’t want to personify evil or demonize men. Eddy writes, “”Evil has no reality. It is neither person, place, nor thing, but is simply a belief, an illusion  of material sense.”  Okay. Let me think about that for a moment. Evil is an illusion. Hunh. It sure SEEMS real, doesn’t it? But… “Evil thoughts and aims reach no farther and do no more harm than one’s belief permits. Evil thoughts, lusts, and malicious purposes cannot go forth, like wandering pollen, from one human mind to another, finding unsuspected lodgment, if virtue and truth build a strong defence.” A Facebook friend said, upon watching the aforementioned videoclip, that these “folks are mesmerized.” And I think she’s spot on with that observation. In that sense, it IS an illusion – an illusion of power and belonging – a hypnotic suggestion that to follow the path towards bigotry and hatred is somehow a good thing. Illusion. There is no real power for folks who hate on others – hating on people doesn’t make you healthier or happier or stronger – it has no power to make the world a better place. And that’s the only power that really matters, right?

And now I’m thinking about all the really wonderful and noble people in my community of friends – good people – generous and caring and thoughtful and honest – decent, fearless individuals. THOSE are the people with the real power, right?

Okay. It’s time to get ready for work. I think first I’ll listen to Joan Baez sing one of my favorite songs, though…

“We are not afraid, we are not afraid today… deep in my heart I do believe we shall overcome someday.” (Charles Albert Tindley)

The Christmas Dog

Excerpted from Blessings: Adventures of a Madcap Christian Scientist and The Madcap Christian Scientist’s Christmas Book:

Christmas Eve, 1988.  I was in a funk.  I couldn’t see that I was making much progress in my life.  My teaching career seemed to be frozen, and I was beginning to think my husband and I would never own our own home or have children. The world seemed a very bleak and unhappy place to me.  No matter how many batches of fudge I whipped up or how many times I heard Bing Crosby sing “White Christmas,” I couldn’t seem to find the Christmas spirit.

I was washing the breakfast dishes, thinking my unhappy thoughts, when I heard gunshots coming from the pasture behind our house.  I thought it was the neighbor boys shooting at the seagulls again and, all full of teacherly harrumph, decided to take it upon myself to go out and “have a word with them.”

But after I’d marched outside I realized that it wasn’t the neighbor boys at all.  John, the dairy farmer who lived on the adjoining property, was walking away with a rifle, and an animal (a calf, I thought) was struggling to get up in the field behind our house.  Every time it would push up on its legs it would immediately collapse back to the ground.

I wondered if maybe John had made a mistake and accidentally shot the animal, so I ran out to investigate and found that the animal was a dog.  It had foam and blood around its muzzle.  She was vulnerable and helpless – had just been shot, after all – but instead of lashing out at me or growling as I’d expect an injured animal to do, she was looking up at me with an expression of trust and seemed to be expecting me to take care of her.

“John!”  I yelled, running after the farmer.  He turned around, surprised to see me.  “John, what happened?” I asked, pointing back towards the dog.

A look of remorse came into his eyes.  “Oh, I’m sorry you saw that, Karen. The dog is a stray and it’s been chasing my cows.  I had to kill it.”

“But John, it’s not dead yet.”

John looked back at the dog and grimaced.  “Oh man,” he said.  “I’m really sorry. I’ll go finish the job.  Put it out of its misery.”

By this time another dog had joined the dog that had been shot.  It was running around its friend, barking encouragement, trying to get its buddy to rise up and escape.  The sight of the one dog trying to help his comrade broke my heart.  I made a quick decision. “Let me and my husband take care of it.”

“Are you sure?”

I nodded and he agreed to let me do what I could for the animal.

Unbeknownst to me, as soon as I ran out of the house my husband, knowing that something was wrong, had gotten out his binoculars and was watching my progress in the field.  He saw the look on my face as I ran back.  By the time I reached our house he was ready to do whatever he needed to do to help me.  I explained the situation to him, we put together a box full of towels, and he called the vet.

As we drove his truck around to where the dog lay in the field, I noticed that, while the dog’s canine companion had finally left the scene (never to be seen again), John had gone to the dog and was kneeling down next to her.  He was petting her, using soothing words to comfort her, and the dog was looking up at John with that look of trust she’d given me.  John helped my husband load her in the back of the truck and we began our drive to the vet’s.

I rode in the back of the truck with the dog as my husband drove, and sang hymns to her.  As I sang words from one of my favorite hymns from the Christian Science Hymnal– “Everlasting arms of Love are beneathe, around, above” – the dog leaned against my shoulder and looked up at me with an expression of pure love in her blue eyes.

Once we reached the animal clinic, the veterinarian came out to take a look at her.  After checking her over he told us that apparently a bullet had gone through her head, that he’d take care of her over the holiday weekend – keep her warm and hydrated – but that he wasn’t going to give her any medical treatment.  I got the distinct impression that he didn’t think the dog was going to make it.

My husband and I went to my parents’ home for the Christmas weekend, both of us praying that the dog would still be alive when we returned.  For me, praying for her really meant trying to see the dog as God sees her.  I tried to realize the wholeness and completeness of her as an expression of God, an idea of God.  I reasoned that all the dog could experience was the goodness of God – all she could feel is what Love feels, all she could know is what Truth knows, all she could be is the perfect reflection of God.  I tried to recognize the reality of these things for me, too, and for all of God’s creation.

She made it through the weekend, but when we went to pick her up the vet told us that she wasn’t “out of the woods, yet.”    He told us that if she couldn’t eat, drink, or walk on her own in the next few days, we’d need to bring her back and he’d need to put her to sleep.

We brought her home and put her in a big box in our living room, with a bowl of water and soft dog food by her side.  I continued to pray.  In the middle of the night I got up and went out to where she lay in her box.  Impulsively, I bent down and scooped some water from the dish into her mouth.  She swallowed it, and then leaned over and drank a little from the bowl.  I was elated!  Inspired by her reaction to the water, I bent over and grabbed a glob of dog food and threw a little onto her tongue.  She smacked her mouth together, swallowed the food, and leaned over to eat a bit more.  Now I was beyond elated!  She’d accomplished two of the three requirements the vet had made for her!

The next day I took her out for a walk.  She’d take a few steps and then lean against me.  Then she’d take a few more steps and lean.  But she was walking!  We would not be taking her back to the veterinarian.

In the next two weeks her progress was amazing.  By the end of that period she was not only walking, but running and jumping and chasing balls.  Her appetite was healthy.  She was having no problems drinking or eating.

But one of the most amazing parts of this whole Christmas blessing was the relationship that developed between this dog and the man who had shot her.  They became good friends.  The dog, in fact, became the neighborhood mascot.  (And she never again chased anyone’s cows.)

What the dog brought to me, who had, if you recall, been in a deep funk when she entered our lives, was a sense of the true spirit of Christmas – the Christly spirit of forgiveness, hope, faith, love.  She brought me the recognition that nothing, absolutely nothing, is impossible to God.

We named our new dog Christmas because that is what she brought us that year.

Within a few years all those things that I had wondered if I would ever have as part of my life came to me – a teaching job, children, and a home of our own.  It is my belief that our Christmas Dog prepared my heart to be ready for all of those things to enter my life.

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Know that Love is God

Be still, and know that Love is God…

know that Love is God

Love Is With Thee

“Fear thou not; for (Love) is with thee: be not dismayed; for (Love) is thy God: (Love) will strengthen thee; yea, (Love) will help thee; yea, (Love) will uphold thee with the right hand of Love’s righteousness.” 

– Isaiah 41:10 and I John 4:7

photo by Karen Molenaar Terrell

photo by Karen Molenaar Terrell

“I have wrestled with the beast and emerged victorious! Mostly.”

I have wrestled with the beast and I have emerged victorious! And in one piece. Mostly. Okay, so there’s a teensy chip out of my forehead. But other than that… I’m good.

I got it into my head that today I would go through the mountain of mail we’ve been accumulating on our counter over the last several months. And when I say “mountain” I am not exaggerating – it over-flowed a basket I started putting it in, and then slowly crept along the counter, working its way west like some insidious beast.

It took more than four hours. I filled up a quarter of our recycle bin. I finally got to a place where I was sorting what was left into files and notebooks. I put one of the notebooks back on its shelf, the notebook knocked a framed poster above it, which knocked the framed poster above IT, and the top poster came crashing down on my head. Glass everywhere. I sort of crumpled up underneath the frame and squatted there until I felt my senses come back to me…

… and felt blood coming down my face…

My husband tried to help – wiped the blood off my face – put a towel to my forehead…

I started laughing.

I went into the living room and started singing hymns to myself. My husband poked his head in to see what I was up to in there, and started cracking up when he saw me. We are a fine pair.

I started taking stock of myself then: Still bleeding? Nope. Still breathing? Yup. Able to think? Yup – well, I mean… as well as I ever did. Has anything really changed here? Nope. Okay. I think you’re good to go…

The son and I had been watching an old Disney movie together – Robin Hood and Little John – and reminiscing about those years when he was little and we’d watch old Disney movies together. We were having a cozy, nostalgic time together tonight. Eating pop corn and drinking cocoa while I worked my way through the flotsam and jetsam on the counter, and he did homework for his university classes. And I felt so completely wrapped up in the warmth and coziness and love all around me that the crashing poster just didn’t seem a part of my night – it couldn’t touch me, or take away from the sweetness of the night in any way.

It was like the whole thing had never happened.

And, speaking metaphysically, I guess it never really did. 🙂

“Accidents are unknown to God, or immortal Mind, and we must leave the mortal basis of belief and unite with the one Mind, in order to change the notion of chance to the proper sense of God’s unerring direction and thus bring out harmony.”
– Mary Baker Eddy

Report to the Mother Planet

- Karen Molenaar Terrell

– Karen Molenaar Terrell