Middle of the night.
I get up to talk to
my Father-Mother.
She laughs with delight
opens her arms wide
and enfolds me in Love.
Home.
– Karen Molenaar Terrell
“The sharp experiences of belief in the supposititious life of matter, as well as our disappointments and ceaseless woes, turn us like tired children to the arms of divine Love.”
– Mary Baker Eddy
(NASA photo)
Rising above
the cacophony
lifted by Love
the noise wanes
as I gain
height until it ceases
to be and I am in flight
among the stars
a universe alight
with joy and hope
part of me, part of you,
we are part of this
every moment new
-Karen Molenaar Terrell
Please do not tell me what I believe, feel, and think.
– Do not assume because I am a progressive and tend to vote for Democrats that I don’t believe in God, “hate the Bible,” and want to kill babies and take away your guns.
– Do not assume because I believe in God that I am anti-science, believe the earth is flat and the world was, literally, created in seven days.
– Do not assume that because I’m white, middle-aged and named “Karen” I am racist and want to talk to your manager.
– Do not assume that because I identify as a “Christian” I am conservative, opposed to LGBTQ rights, opposed to women’s rights, travel heavily armed, and am voting for you-know-who.
I think if we see others in terms of stereotypes we miss out on some beautiful friendships and kinship with our fellow humans.
-Karen Molenaar Terrell
My biggest challenge right now is myself. I guess that’s always my biggest challenge, isn’t it? Stay kind, Karen. Stay true. Keep loving. Look for ways to bring humor to those in desperate need of a good laugh. Don’t hate. Never hate. Be wise – but don’t be cynical. Be discerning – but don’t be cruel.
Love, help me be what you need me to be.
Amen.
– Karen Molenaar Terrell
(Photo by Karen Molenaar Terrell.)
You are not alone
a vessel for fear
shivering in the dark.
You are embraced in light
made of courage
a reflection of Love.
– Karen Molenaar Terrell
I woke up fretting
worries on my head
Looking up from my bed
and out the window
a lone star shone bright
connecting me to universal
infinite boundless light
reaching out to me
beyond earth’s night.
– Karen Molenaar Terrell
My ego has been struggling the last month or so – and that can sometimes seem painful as it’s happening – but it has also meant huge growth for my true sense of be-ing.
“…all things work together for good to those who love Love…”
– Romans 8:28
So a month ago I decided to google myself. (Note to the wise: DO NOT GOOGLE YOURSELF. EVER. FOR ANY REASON.) What has come up in the past have been links to my books, maybe some letters I wrote to newspapers, a link to my blog, a couple stories about my dad. Stuff like that. And I’m used to seeing four or five stars come up with my books. And my ego has really enjoyed that.
But what has been coming up for the last month or so on the first Google page of my search has been a one-star rating for an audiobook I made of Blessings. And that one-star rating is stuck to that first page like a slug to my sunflowers.
A little background about my audiobook: Back in 2013 – after one or two of my vision-challenged friends asked me to do this – I used my husband’s garageband app on his Mac and a headphone and mic I bought for $29.95 at Best Buy to make an audio recording of my book. My son showed me how to click on stuff – showed me how to watch the sound-waves and moderate the volume – and then patted me on the back and wished me luck.
I never actually expected anyone to buy this thing – except maybe those one or two friends who’d asked me to make it. And I haven’t thought much about it. I mean… until I found the one-star rating on the front page of Google.
I know it’s been good for me to find it there: It’s nudged me to contemplate what constitutes my true identity and value; to snuggle in close to divine Love; and to spend some time in self-reflection. And I’ve learned something about myself: At first, I was tempted to just delete the recording – but then I thought of the reason I’d made the recording in the first place – as an outreach to my friends who are struggling with their sight – so I sucked it up and kept the recording there. And I feel good about myself for that – for putting my friends ahead of my ego.
Anyway. Apparently Australia has its own audible.com audiobook site and yesterday I found some dear (and highly discerning ) soul in Australia had given the exact same audio recording 5 stars all across the boards. Bless that person.
Of course, I had to take a picture. 🙂
Tomorrow is the 15th anniversary of the publication of Blessings. Whoah. Times flies when you’re having fun… 🙂
(It has 33 reviews and 4.7 stars now! Whoo hoot!)
Here’s the introduction:
“Happiness is spiritual, born of Truth and Love. It is unselfish; therefore it cannot exist alone, but requires all mankind to share it.”
-From Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures by Mary Baker Eddy
***
Years ago an old boyfriend said to me, “I can’t see that Christian Science has made you any better than anyone else.”
“I know!” I said, nodding my head in complete and happy agreement, “But can you imagine what I’d be like without it?!”
He raised his eyebrows and laughed. What could he say? He was looking at a self-centered, moralistic, stubborn idealist who saw everything in terms of black and white. But I could have been worse. I believe without Christian Science I would have been worse.
Let’s get one thing clear from the start: I am not the best example of a Christian Scientist. I’m not as disciplined as I could be. I have fears and worries and doubts. I’m a little neurotic. I am the Lucy Ricardo of Christian Scientists.
I should probably put in a disclaimer here, too—the views expressed in these pages are not necessarily the views shared by other Christian Scientists. Christian Scientists are really a pretty diverse group of people—there are Democrat Christian Scientists and Republican Christian Scientists, “Green,” and “Red,” and “Blue” Christian Scientists, and Christian Scientists with no political affiliations at all. Frankly, I like that about us. We keep each other on our toes.
I should also tell you that this book is not an authorized piece of Christian Science literature. If you want to actually study Christian Science you should probably read the textbook for this way of life, Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures by Mary Baker Eddy.
My purpose for writing this epistle is really two-fold (I don’t think I’ve ever used the word “two-fold” in my life, and using it now is making me feel sort of professorial. I like the feeling.):
First-foldly, to introduce you to one Christian Scientist so that if you ever hear someone talking fearfully and ignorantly (feargnorantly?) about Christian Scientists you’ll be in a position to say, “I have a friend who’s a Christian Scientist, and, although it’s true she’s a bit of a nut, she’s also…” and you can go on and talk about how your friend has used her study of Christian Science to try to make the world a happier place.
Second-foldly, I feel the need to acknowledge God’s blessings in my life. I don’t want to be like those nine lepers in the Bible who couldn’t take the time to thank Jesus for healing them. I want to be like that one leper who “fell down on his face at his feet” before Jesus and gave him thanks (Luke 17). Through my study of Christian Science I’ve witnessed some incredible proofs of our Father-Mother God’s love for Her creation in my life. God has filled my life with infinite blessings and it’s time for me to acknowledge these blessings to others.
Why do folks put guns and God – “gunsandGod” – together in the same breath like they’re somehow connected – somehow equivalent? It makes no sense to me.
Ed Mazza wrote a story in “The Huffington Post” that talked about our president’s attack on his political rival, Joe Biden – an attack that appeared to include the “guns” and “God” equivalency. Mazza relates: “Although Biden is a practicing Catholic who has for years talked openly about his faith, Trump claimed he was ‘against God,’ then launched into a rambling attack on Thursday: ‘Take away your guns, destroy your Second Amendment. No religion, no anything. Hurt the Bible. Hurt God. He’s against God. He’s against guns. He’s against energy. Our kind of energy.’
Mazza continues: “Biden later defended his faith as the ‘bedrock foundation’ of his life.’It’s provided me comfort in moments of loss and tragedy, it’s kept me grounded and humbled in times of triumph and joy,’ he said. He described Trump as ‘shameful’ for the attack. He added: ‘My faith teaches me to love my neighbor as I would myself while President Trump only seeks to divide us. My faith teaches me to care for the least among us while President Trump seems to only be concerned about his gilded friends. My faith teaches me to welcome the stranger while President Trump tears families apart. My faith teaches me to walk humbly while President Trump teargassed peaceful protesters so he could walk over to a church for a photo op’.”
Guns and God. Turnips and God makes as much sense to me. If you love God, you must love turnips, too, right? Or… if you don’t love turnips, you must not love God? Or… if you love turnips you must love guns…and God…? Eesh. Maybe it’s all too deep for me to understand.
Anyway. Here’s some of what The Bible actually says about weapons:
“Wisdom is better than weapons of war.”
– Ecclesiastes 9:18
“They shall beat their swords into plowshares, And their spears into pruning hooks; Nation shall not lift up sword against nation, Neither shall they learn war anymore.”
-Isaiah 2:4
“Then said Jesus unto him, Put up again thy sword into his place:for all they that take the sword shall perish with the sword.”
– Matthew 6:25
And here’s what Mary Baker Eddy, the founder of Christian Science, has to say about “the cannon’s mouth”:
“A few immortal sentences, breathing the omnipotence of divine justice, have been potent to break despotic fetters and abolish the whipping post and slave market; but oppression neither went down in blood, nor did the breath of freedom come from the cannon’s mouth. Love is the liberator.”
-Karen Molenaar Terrell
(Photo of cannons at Antietam by Karen Molenaar Terrell.)
I found ten perfect minutes today – sitting in the shade outside the coffee shop – all alone in the space set aside for patrons, sipping my blueberry-spinach-coconut milk smoothie. I watched the sailboats and paddle boarders and kayakers gliding by on the bay – and, with my mask securely fastened about my face – asked a pair of friends who’ve known each other for 40 years if I could take their photo for them – they said yes and thank you. Another pair of friends – a black woman and a white woman – walked by and stopped on the walk in front of me to look out at the water – and I had to comment on the beautiful sweater one of the friends was wearing – she smiled and thanked me and told me she ordered her sweater online. Just as I was contemplating leaving and continuing on with my walk a family came out of the coffee shop and joined me in the space for patrons – my table was the only one in the shade, and I told them that I was leaving and they could sit where I was. They smiled and – making sure to keep the proper social distance – we moved around each other and they took over the table out of the sun.
Ten perfect minutes is a pretty wonderful thing.
-Karen Molenaar Terrell
Adventures of the Madcap Christian Scientist 