Window seat on the flight out glaciered peaks and patchwork fields glistening rivers and cloud towers and tiny towns in the hours from here to there – imagining the people below looking up and seeing the jet stream from their backyards. Mentally waving to them. Time and space to look inside-out and breathe and rest and enjoy our route.
Aisle seat on the flight back in greeting people as they walk past me – Red Carnegie-Mellon t-shirts, masks of rainbow colors, a skateboard with a PNW Native American design and “Can you tell I’m smiling?” I ask, pointing to my smiley mask.
Flight out and flight back in – a balance for the introvert and extrovert in me looking out and looking in, and breathe out and breathe in. -Karen Molenaar Terrell
I’m feeling weirdly untethered – like I got dropped from the sky and am in free fall or got unhooked from the line that connects me to the Mother Ship and am floating off into space. It is scary and also kind of exhilarating.
Retirement ain’t for sissies. -Karen Molenaar Terrell
I saw a terrible thing yesterday – Involving a mama duck and her baby ducklings and a freeway and a car next to me rolling through feathers. I saw a dead body, and downy feathers on little webbed feet scurrying into the woods without their mama. I pulled over and moved the mama’s still-warm body off the road, tried to call to the babies to come out, wanting to gather them in my arms and bring them home, and keep them safe. And who can I talk to about this ache in my heart? Who would understand?
There was a misunderstanding months ago in the supermarket, involving a woman in a Seahawks mask – I thought she could be a new friend. I tried to connect to her in the aisle between bulk foods and olive oil – “Go Seahawks!” I said, muffled behind my mask. She looked at me above her mask, and frowned, and I knew the Seahawks fan didn’t understand what I’d said – – she couldn’t read my lips or see my smile, and I’d scared her – she was Black and I am White and we live in a time of distrust and fear. The Seahawks fan left quickly, before I could explain. And who can I talk to about this ache in my heart? Who would understand?
I drove by a big rhododendron bush with fat red flowers and thought of Mom and the rhododendron bush she’d planted by the front door of our old home and felt a sudden yearning for her warm hugs and her words of comfort and reassurance. If she were still here I could talk to her about the orphaned ducklings and the woman in the Seahawks mask and my fears and worries and insecurities and she would love me. And who do I talk to now about this ache in my heart?
And the answer came in an instant – a joyous Presence enfolded me in peace and love, without question or judgment or condition or hesitation, affirming the power of Good: Love’s communication of never-ending Life and never-ending care for Her creation – care for ducklings, and a woman in a Seahawks mask, and Mom and me. Love knows what’s in my heart. She knows my intent. And I know I can let it all go – She’s got this. Love gives all Her children exactly what we need, exactly when we need it, and in the exactly right way – including Her ducks and Her child in a Seahawks mask and Her child who is my Mom, and Her child who is me.
Who can I talk to about the ache in my heart? My Father-Mother Love. Always and forever. -Karen Molenaar Terrell
“The intercommunication is always from God to His idea, man.” -Mary Baker Eddy
I spied an escapee cricket in the PetSmart store today, hopping down the aisle past dog toys and making a left at dog food. I wanted to cup him in my hands and take him outside, but I realized that would be shop-lifting. So I let him hop on and wished him well. -Karen Molenaar Terrell
“…let no mortal interfere with God’s government by thrusting in the laws of erring, human concepts.” -Mary Baker Eddy
Feel the unending, enduring power of Truth enveloping all of creation with wings of Love sure and all-knowing, without fear or doubt
See the shoddy, shaky, shabby walls of sham and lies come crumbling down into dust and blow away in the changing winds – returning to the nothing they came from
There was never a need for the lies evil is never a solution; error solves nothing; Hate serves no purpose.
Government of justice rises from the dust and rust as it must. In Truth we trust. -Karen Molenaar Terrell
So I’m lying in bed this morning and I realize I have a choice – I don’t HAVE to get out of bed today.
If I get out of bed there are sure to be problems and complications. I am almost guaranteed to make SOMEbody angry today. I am pretty much guaranteed to say the wrong thing to someone at the wrong time in the wrong place in the wrong way. I may get in someone’s way. Someone may get in MY way. I may lose my temper today. I may be thoughtless and unkind. I may die if I get out of bed.
On the other hand, I may die if I stay in my bed, too. I may miss out on a chance to be thoughtful and kind. I may miss an opportunity to learn something new and to laugh, and meet a new friend, and see an eagle soar, and enjoy the sunshine on my face.
It takes courage to get out of bed each day.
To all the courageous people who dare to get out bed and face whatever comes between now and tomorrow – I wish you all the wonder and magic you find today because you got out of bed. -Karen Molenaar Terrell
Last night: Went outside and took a walk around the house and let the twilight wrap itself around me. Listened to the frogsong, and birds chirping to each other. Breathed in the cool evening air, filled with the scents of apple blossom and just-mowed grass and damp earth. And a flood of memories rushed into my thoughts: sitting outside with Dad when I was a little girl, looking at the stars and watching for satellites; Camping out at Mount Rainier – the family sitting around the campfire while Dad played his accordion. Family trips into the Canadian Rockies. And I felt Dad with me, right now, looking at the evening sky with me. Always with me.
(Photo of a Skagit County, Washington, sunset by Karen Molenaar Terrell.)
He was waiting outside the store when I came out with my groceries and I said hi. He smiled and said hi back. Give and take. Who taught him to smile? Who taught me?
I started to wheel my cart to my car mentally scrolling through my shopping list to see if I had anything to share with him. Tangerines! I rolled my cart back towards him. You want an orange? Sure! Can you catch it? Yeah! And he smiled at the idea of a game of catch. I tossed. He caught. Who taught me how to throw? Who taught him how to catch? My dad? His dad? And now our dads are connected in our give and take.
As Scott drove west, a train engine went west in reverse. Our car passed the train as the engineer sat facing me and I smiled across the tracks at him and he smiled and waved back to me. I caught his wave and returned it. Who taught him how to wave? Who taught me? All the cosmos connected in a giant give and take. -Karen Molenaar Terrell
Adventures of the Madcap Christian Scientist 