What Will Matter in Fifty Years

Last night as I was falling asleep I thought again of that one-star rating someone gave me for my audio book (that rating appears at the top of the page any time I google myself) and I came to terms with it. Sort of. I figured it was going to be there as long as I needed it to be there. I decided to be grateful for whatever lesson I need to learn from it. And then I thought bigger than that. When I die, I realized, none of any of that is going to matter – not the five stars, not the one star, not my name or my reputation or my popularity – that stuff – all of it – will soon be forgotten and in 50 years nobody will even remember “Karen Molenaar Terrell” was here. The one star and the five stars have nothing to do with who I really am – with my real identity as a child of the Cosmos. What WILL matter in 50 years is that I was kind while I was here, and honest. Even though my name won’t be remembered, I figure any kindness I leave behind me will leave an impression – a ripple maybe – that will join all the other ripples of kindness and help bring our little boat of mankind to the shore in a wave of Love. (I know. I am so deep, right?)

So anyway – this morning – the first morning of 2021 – I googled me again (I cannot help myself – remember that scene in “Schitt’s Creek” where Johnny asks a freaked-out Moira if she “googled” herself again?) and some kind someone had added a 5-star rating to my audio book! Bless their heart. That brings my audiobook up to three stars now. And – to be honest (and because I’m still human) – that feels a lot better than one star.

Thank you, kind person.

This little identity-theft-got-skype-hacked-maybe-all-my-accounts-have-been-compromised blip in my life…

I am tired.
I am teacher-on-Friday tired.
I am Dad-is-99-and-on-hospice tired.
I am a-loved-one-has-died tired.
And you think I have energy
and time to worry about THIS
little identity-theft-got-skype-hacked-
compromised blip in my life?!

“Identity theft” can’t steal my real identity,
and dishonesty can’t destroy what’s true.
Lies can’t destroy what really matters –
the beauty in the world, and Love’s
love for me and you.

I have reached that place in my life
where I no longer can find the time
to worry about all the possible things
that may happen – I’ve found
all that’s really real is fine.

– Karen Molenaar Terrell

so tired

“The divine Mind maintains all identities, from a blade of grass to a star, as distinct and eternal… Evil has no reality. It is neither person, place, nor thing, but is simply a belief, an illusion of material sense. The identity, or idea, of all reality continues forever…”

“Error is false, mortal belief; it is illusion, without spiritual identity or foundation, and it has no real existence.”

“We admit that black is not a color, because it reflects no light. So evil should be denied identity or power, because it has none of the divine hues.”

“God is the Life, or intelligence, which forms and preserves the individuality and identity of animals as well as of men.”
 – Mary Baker Eddy, Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures