Karen's stories have appeared in *Newsweek*, *The Christian Science Monitor*, and *Pack and Paddle Magazine* and she's the author of *Are You Taking Me Home Now?: Adventures with Dad*, *The Second Hundred Years: Further Adventures with Dad*, *The Brush of Angel Wings*, *The Madcap Christian Scientist* series, *A Poem Sits on my Windowsill*, *Finding the Rainbows: Lessons from Dad and Mom*, and co-author of *The Humoristian Chronicles: A Most Unusual Fellowship*. Her photos are featured in the spring 2014 edition of the *Bellingham Review*, and the "Photos from the Field" page of the April/May 2017, December/January 2018-2019, April/May 2019, and June/July 2020 issues of of *Mother Earth News*. Her photos can be found here: https://www.flickr.com/photos/60803140@N06/
Her books can be found here: http://www.amazon.com/Karen-Molenaar-Terrell/e/B0044P90RQ/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1312060042&sr=8-
Give me time and space working at my own pace and I can get it done for the team But it is a waste of resources when a supervisor forces us to be all in one place at the same hour to get ourselves tangled in directions all mangled like a snake with heads at both ends -Karen Molenaar Terrell
I’m nervous about this one. It’s kind of wordy and “out there.” But I just had this amazing cosmic experience and I had to share…
I wake and feel Life quivering around me and through me. The presence of Love is here and I am within the presence, connected to the Cosmic Body. Not a “Borg” body – not a matter-body of computer chips and nanoprobes – but the Body of Spirit, the Body of Love.
You are embodied in Me, too – not embodied in “me” – but embodied in the one Me – the one “I AM.” We are cells of the same Body. Not competitors. Not separate. But connected. Inseparable. What is good in you – all that is smart and courageous and beautiful and graceful – is good in My Body, too – for we are in the same Body, and have the same Body. All that is wise and kind in you – is mine, too, for we are in the same Mind. And all that is good in me is your good, too. We can claim all that is good – all that is OF Good – for our own.
Faces pass in front of my vision – loved ones who’ve died and loved ones who are with me, here. And I’m connected to all of them still – not separated by time or space or place in this Body of Love,
.And then other faces pass in front of my vision – people I’ve thought were my enemies, my rivals, my competition. And I see that they are embodied in Me, too – not the little me, but the big Me, the Cosmic Me. And the cells are distinct, but not separate. And I love them, too – we are all in the Body of Love.
I feel Earth breathing through my window smell her sweet breath of dew and life and know she is embodied in God’s body, too, and we are connected – all of God’s creatures and I.
Jesus said, “Take, eat; this is my body.” Yes, Jesus is embodied in Me, too, and we are embodied in the one Body – not the body of the human Jesus, but the body of Christ – the Body of Love.
We are nothing less than the perfection of Love. -Karen Molenaar Terrell
“And as they were eating, Jesus took bread, and blessed it, and brake it, and gave it to the disciples, and said, Take, eat; this is my body.” – Matthew 26:26
“Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus.” – Philippians 2:5
For the body is not one member, but many. If the foot shall say, Because I am not the hand, I am not of the body; is it therefore not of the body? And if the ear shall say, Because I am not the eye, I am not of the body; is it therefore not of the body? If the whole body were an eye, where were the hearing? If the whole were hearing, where were the smelling? But now hath God set the members every one of them in the body, as it hath pleased him. And the eye cannot say unto the hand, I have no need of thee: nor again the head to the feet, I have no need of you. That there should be no schism in the body; but that the members should have the same care one for another. And whether one member suffer, all the members suffer with it; or one member be honoured, all the members rejoice with it. Now ye are the body of Christ, and members in particular. – I Corinthians 12:14-18, 21, 25-27
“No man is an island entire of itself; every man is a piece of the continent…” – John Donne
“The divine Mind maintains all identities, from a blade of grass to a star, as distinct and eternal.” – Mary Baker Eddy
Karen Molenaar Terrell’s Scrapbook of a Year and a Day is, essentially, a compilation of Facebook posts written between January 19, 2020 and January 20, 2021. If I were to collect my FB posts, it would be very, very dull indeed, but Karen eliminated the silly cat videos, if she ever posted any, and has instead put together a moving and coherent account of the tumultuous year we all lived through and her personal experience of the year following the death of her father, Dee Molenaar. What I particularly love about Karen–and this book–is her perspective on things and her constant striving to live up to her ideals.
I’m really not a dog-earrer–I find it a vile habit–and yet I folded down the corners on several pages. For example:
August 25, 2020 Please do not tell me what I believe, feel, and think. -Do not assume because I am a progressive and tend to vote for Democrats that I don’t believe in God, “hate the Bible,” and want to kill babies and take away your guns. –Do not assume because I believe in God that I am anti-science, believe the earth is flat and the world was, literally, created in seven days. –Do not assume that because I’m white, middle-aged and named “Karen” I am racist and want to talk to your manager. –Do not assume because I identify as “Christian” I am conservative, opposed to LGBTQ rights, opposed to women’s rights, travel heavily armed, and am voting for you-know-who.
I think that if we see each other in terms of stereotypes we miss out on some beautiful friendships and kinships with our fellow humans.
My biggest challenge right now is myself. I guess that’s always my biggest challenge, isn’t it? Stay kind, Karen. Stay true. Keep loving. Look for ways to bring humor to those in desperate need of a good laugh. Don’t hate. Never hate. Be wise–but don’t be cynical. Be discerning–but don’t be cruel.
Love, help me be what you need me to be. Amen.
October 17, 2020 {A lot of anecdote, involving buying shoes for a guy on the street, deleted here because there’s only so much typing I’m willing to do. But it’s a beautiful story.}
People WANT to do right by each other, don’t they?
I felt like I was walking on holy ground today. I think . . . I think it all balances out, you know? –Good disperses itself throughout the cosmos–and I know that I’ll always have what I need–there’s no lack–there’s no competition–there’s no need to go through life clutching and afraid and feeling like Good is limited and finite, and if someone else has enough then I won’t have enough.
Solace at the Cemetery In these panicked times In these fretful, frenzied, frantic times I have found solace at the cemetery. The shells of those who’ve lived here and moved on to whatever comes beyond no longer need to distance themselves from anyone, from me. I find peace with them–the chrysalises of my friends–Mike, Rachael, and Debby.
I wander amid the tombstones, snapping photos of them, and the spinning wheels– the bright spinners are the only movement in the cemetery and I feel drawn to the movement of their rainbow spinning, faster and faster as I approach, in a show just for me.
I’m allowed to be here. In the sunshine. In the peace of the cemetery. And no one disturbs me as I wander through the final beds for the shells of those who are no longer scared of what lies ahead.
I’m not saying it’s a flawless book–there are a lot of commas I’m itching to add to these excerpts–but it’s a truly beautiful book, full of genuine goodness and kindness. These days, I’ll really, really take that.
Whatever spiritual, emotional and/or mental tools we each have acquired over the years – this is the time to use them. Our world needs every gift and talent we have to share. Be brave. Be kind. Be fair. Be generous. Love. Above all else, let’s love. Let’s love like there’s no tomorrow. Let’s love without limit or condition. Let’s love like the very existence of the world depends on it. Let’s let Love guide our every word and action.
But I’m alive right now – in this moment. And what am I doing with this moment? I’m going to take this moment to send out love. There. Did you feel it? -Karen Molenaar Terrell
“Fed by Thy love divine we live, for Love alone is life…” -Mary Baker Eddy
So, on my walk yesterday, I saw a man wearing a t-shirt that said: “PROUD WHITE BOY.” I’m not going to describe the physicality of this man – other than to say that, obviously, he was White.
But his shirt got me to wondering. Was he proud because he was White? Was he proud because he was a “boy”? And… why would he be proud of things he has no control over? It’s like being proud of being human, or being proud of being born in this country. Being born here, and being born White, and being born male are not things that anybody has to earn. They are not achievements. They are not proof of your courage or evidence of your hard work. They are just the happenstances of your start in life – a part of earth’s crap shoot. And there’s no reason, in my mind, to be proud – or ashamed, either – of the happenstances of your human start.
It’s what comes after your start – the life you build here – that shows the most important things about you: Are you living a life of kindness? Of moral courage? Do you stand up for others? Are you generous with the good Life gives you? Are you honest? Are you living a life of integrity? Are you using your talents and gifts to make the world a better place? To me, those are the things that matter.
A t-shirt that says “PROUD TO BE KIND” would make more sense to me. Or maybe “PROUD TO BE HUMBLE.” 🙂
“…the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such there is no law.” -Galatians 5:22-23
Do you think you need to be the strongest and the wisest the fastest and the funniest the most talented or smartest the most adulated artist the bravest or most famous? Do you think you need to be flawless, mistake-proof over the roof human perfection to be loved and loveable? You are right now and already everything you need to be. -Karen Molenaaar Terrell
You are not alone. Know this. You are not alone. There’s nothing expected of you here There’s no obligation to me There’s nothing I require of you There’s nothing you have to do to earn my love You are worthy just as you are. -Karen Molenaar Terrell
Cosmic Connections: Finding the Joy is available as a paperback now. It should be available as an e-book in a few days. Here’s another excerpt from the book:
I’d Never Been Alone At All! (Originally published on September 24th, 2019.)
He stood out – literally – he was, like, a foot taller than everyone around him. He had hair the color of copper and an Irish accent. She stood next to him – coming just below his shoulders – with dark hair and lively eyes and an accent that came from somewhere in the middle of America. We bonded waiting to get on the airplane – laughing together that we were in the “E” section and would get on last because “they always save the best for last, right?” and “E stands for ‘excellent’, doesn’t it?”
We were bound for Chicago. I mentioned that my husband and I had, just a few weeks before, driven from Seattle to Grand Rapids, Michigan – and had passed by Chicago on our trip. What had taken us five days to achieve then, would take five hours today. The couple told me then that they lived in Michigan – Kalamazoo, to be exact. I told them I loved the word “Kalamazoo” and the copper-haired man told me that before that he’d lived in another town in Michigan with a native name (maybe Missaukee?). And, he told me, he’d almost taken a job in Australia with a really cool Aboriginal name (maybe Woolgoolga?). I told him he needed to go to Walla Walla next, and he started laughing.
Eventually we boarded the bus that would take us to our plane. There were no seats on the bus and everyone had to find a pole or a bar or a hand-loop to grip during the ride. I was too short to reach the bar above me and all the hand-loops were taken. I was looking around trying to figure out how I was going to keep upright, when the red-haired man saw my dilemma and moved aside so I could grip the loop near him – he was tall enough that he could easily hang onto the bar above us. I’m so grateful to him for that because as the bus worked its way across the tarmac there were a lot of stops and turns and I would have ended up doing a face plant on the floor, for sure, if I hadn’t had something to hold onto.
The bus stopped and we all got out and I quickly found my seat on the plane. Or. I THOUGHT I’d found my seat on the plane until a man tapped me gently on the shoulder and asked me my seat number. I told him and, smiling, he pointed me to a seat a row up and over. “I guess you were wondering where you were going to sit?” I asked, laughing. He laughed, too, and everyone graciously made room for me to move across the aisle. When I got settled I looked up and recognized one of the people who’d been on the bus. She was standing in the aisle next to my seat, waiting to find her own seat. The aisle was kind of clogged up, though, and it looked like it might take a while. Recognizing a person with a sense of humor, I said, “You don’t get a seat. One of those hand loop things is going to drop down from the ceiling and you’ll get to hang on to that for the flight.” She started cracking up and said that she’d probably get to have the air mask first, though, if those things dropped down. 🙂
The flight was pretty uneventful – there were some air bumps for a while that forced the flight attendants back to their seats – but everyone was really calm about it all, and, in what seemed like no time, our plane had landed at O’Hare.
***
I had a wonderful day in Chicago – seeing old friends and getting inspired by this year’s speaker at the Christian Science association. I came away feeling revitalized and ready to heal the world.
***
But first I had to deal with my own neuroses. I’d worked myself into kind of a tizzy. When I was younger I’d traveled a lot on my own. But as I’ve gotten older most of my traveling has been with family members and friends. And now I felt like I was all alone, trying to figure things out for myself, and it was scary. My thoughts were going around and around in circles something like this: “I’m going to need to get up at 4:30 to catch the shuttle bus to the airport. How do I set the alarm clock? How do I turn it off? What if I sleep through the alarm? What if the alarm doesn’t go off? What if I miss the shuttle bus and then I miss my plane? And… and… what if I can’t find a kiosk to get my boarding pass? And… what if I mess up at the kiosk and can’t get a boarding pass and miss my plane and get stranded in Chicago for, like, ever? And what if the TSA folks think I look suspicious or something and pull me out of the line and I end up missing my plane and… and… how do I set the alarm clock? How do I turn it off? What if I sleep through the alarm…?
You get the idea. Sheesh.
Of course I didn’t sleep well – tossing and turning, my eyes continually going to the clock. I finally dozed off for a couple hours and came to with a start to find that I’d awakened at exactly 4:24. I got up and set about getting myself dressed and ready. At 4:30 the alarm went off and I pushed the little button and it stopped – just like that. By 4:45 I was joining other folks in the elevator (I thought I’d be the only one getting up at 4:30!) and heading for the lobby. By 5:00 we were all on the bus and heading for the airport. When the people in front of me got off the shuttle at the United terminal I moved to the front so I could hear our bus driver’s voice – it was really deep and beautiful – a James Earl Jones voice – he sounded like he belonged on the radio. I told him this and he started laughing and said that this was the voice he woke up with and it would get higher as the day went on. “This is your morning voice,” I said, nodding. And he laughed and agreed.
***
(Note: All the employees you’re going to read about who helped me – the lady at the kiosk, the security folks, the vendor who showed me where Starbucks was, and the man who assigned me a seat on the plane – were African Americans. I always feel this kind of weird self-conscious awkwardness about mentioning a person’s race – like it shouldn’t matter, right? – but at the moment I’m feeling the need to share that all the wonderful folks who helped me at O’Hare were Black.)
The Delta terminal was the next stop. I got off there and as soon as I walked in the door found a kiosk waiting for me. A Delta employee immediately joined me at the kiosk to help me get my boarding pass. She asked me for my confirmation number and I showed her the teeny tiny letters on my phone and asked her if she could read them because I couldn’t make them out without my glasses. She laughed and said she needed her glasses, too, and quickly pulled them from a pocket and put them on to read the number to me. She soon realized it would go faster for us if she just punched the number in herself – so she did that for me. I made some comment about “women of a certain age” helping each other and she started laughing with me in middle-aged sisterhood. Soon she’d printed out my boarding pass for me, found out what gate I needed to go to, and pointed me that direction.
When I got in line for security I expected to have to go through that cubicle where you have to put your arms up and the body scan dealy checks you out. But this time the security people pointed me into a line where I got to by-pass the scanning machine altogether. That was cool.
And so there I was – safe and sound on the other side of security. All the things I’d been so nervous about were now behind me and looked ridiculous to me from this vantage point. I could feel the Cosmos laughing with me. I imagine the Cosmos finds me pretty entertaining.
Next it was time to find a Starbucks. I stopped at a small vendor of cheeses and fruit and asked her if she could point me to the nearest Starbucks. She looked up at me with a kind of exasperated disbelief and pointed behind her – “Right there,” she said. I saw that the Starbucks was right next to her! Humbled, I said, “Oh, thank you! Sheesh.” A stunning African American woman – she looked like a competent, confident put-together lawyer – happened to be walking by us as this exchange was going on and she looked over at me, a grin on her face, and said, “I heard that.” I laughed with her and told her I was embarrassed, and went to fetch my pumpkin spice latte with whip. Once I had that familiar cup of latte in my hand I went back to the fruit and cheese vendor and bought myself a snack for the plane ride. The vendor graciously thanked me for my business and I thanked her, again, and went to sit in the waiting area.
I had been given a boarding pass without an assigned seat. So when the man appeared behind the podium I went up to him to get a seat. And oh! – he was so fun! I told him I needed a seat – and he grinned and pointed to the row of seats behind him – joking – and then he asked some quick questions, made some snappy small talk as he clicked away on the keyboard – et voila! I had a window seat!
I found a place to sit and, as the waiting area started getting more crowded, I picked up my bags and made room for Mike and Lisa, a middle-aged couple from Indiana. I really enjoyed talking with them. Lisa had arranged an Alaskan cruise for her husband and herself. They were going to visit all the places my husband and I had visited when we went up the Inside Passage seven years ago – Ketchikan, Juneau, Skagway, Sitka – and we talked about all the cool things they were going to see. This was Mike’s first-ever airplane ride. In fact, he told me he’d just had his first-ever train ride, too. In FACT, they’d already taken a car, a bus, and a train to get where they were. “Trains, planes, and automobiles,” I said, and they laughed and said “exactly.”
When it was time to get on the plane I stopped at the podium and made sure to let the man who’d assigned me a seat know how much I’d enjoyed listening to his comedic patter over the microphone as we lined up for boarding. He grinned and thanked me and wished me a good flight.
***
I got my window seat and spent the first half of the flight looking out the window and watching a movie on the screen in front of me. Towards the end of the flight I got into conversation with Eliana, the young woman seated next to me. I’d noticed she was taking an online college course, and shared with her my experience as a high school teacher. We talked about what she’d like to do when she gets out of school – she said she’d like to be a fashion designer – and I could totally picture her doing that. I told her she could name her line of clothes “Eliana” – and that I expected to see her fashion designs out there in a few years.
***
The plane landed a half hour early. I’d left rain in Chicago, and landed in rain in Seattle. There was something very symmetrical and pleasing about that.
As my husband drove me back home, I started thinking about all my ridiculous worries and the fear I’d had of being all on my own, trying to figure things out by myself – and I suddenly realized that I really hadn’t been alone at all! The entire trip I’d had people stepping up to help me out – to give me directions, to make room for me, to laugh with me.
How blessed we are to have each other on Life’s journey! -Karen Molenaar Terrell
Another excerpt from Cosmic Connections (soon to be released):
Robin’s Egg
He comes towards me on the trail– a big, brawny man with a bald head and tattoos on his arms. I turn away to take photos of the ferns on the forest floor and when I turn back he’s passed me. I glance back at the same moment he glances back at me. He uses his walking stick to point to a place on the path near me. I turn in the direction he’s pointing – not sure what he wants me to see – and find myself looking at the remnants of a tiny, fragile blue egg. A new nestling has pecked open her shell. “Robin’s egg,” the big man rumbles in his deep bass voice, a sweet smile on his face. I smile back at him. “It’s beautiful,” I say. “Yes, it is,” he agrees. And he turns and continues down the trail .-Karen Molenaar Terrell