Tag Archives: love

The Christmas Dog

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Click here for the Christian Science Sentinel radio edition, December 17, 2000.

Christmas Eve, 1988.  I was in a funk.  I couldn’t see that I was making much progress in my life.  My teaching career seemed to be frozen, and I was beginning to think my husband and I would never own our own home or have children. The world seemed a very bleak and unhappy place to me.  No matter how many batches of fudge I whipped up or how many times I heard Bing Crosby sing “White Christmas,” I couldn’t seem to find the Christmas spirit.

I was washing the breakfast dishes, thinking my unhappy thoughts, when I heard gunshots coming from the pasture behind our house.  I thought it was the neighbor boys shooting at the seagulls again and, all full of teacherly harrumph, decided to take it upon myself to go out and “have a word with them.”

But after I’d marched outside I realized that it wasn’t the neighbor boys at all.  John, the dairy farmer who lived on the adjoining property, was walking away with a rifle, and an animal (a calf, I thought) was struggling to get up in the field behind our house.  Every time it would push up on its legs it would immediately collapse back to the ground.

I wondered if maybe John had made a mistake and accidentally shot the animal, so I ran out to investigate and found that the animal was a dog.  It had foam and blood around its muzzle.  She was vulnerable and helpless – had just been shot, after all – but instead of lashing out at me or growling as I’d expect an injured animal to do, she was looking up at me with an expression of trust and seemed to be expecting me to take care of her.

“John!”  I yelled, running after the farmer.  He turned around, surprised to see me.  “John, what happened?” I asked, pointing back towards the dog.

A look of remorse came into his eyes.  “Oh, I’m sorry you saw that, Karen. The dog is a stray and it’s been chasing my cows.  I had to kill it.”

“But John, it’s not dead yet.”

John looked back at the dog and grimaced.  “Oh man,” he said.  “I’m really sorry. I’ll go finish the job.  Put it out of its misery.”

By this time another dog had joined the dog that had been shot.  It was running around its friend, barking encouragement, trying to get its buddy to rise up and escape.  The sight of the one dog trying to help his comrade broke my heart.  I made a quick decision. “Let me and my husband take care of it.”

“Are you sure?”

I nodded and he agreed to let me do what I could for the animal.

Unbeknownst to me, as soon as I ran out of the house my husband, knowing that something was wrong, had gotten out his binoculars and was watching my progress in the field.  He saw the look on my face as I ran back.  By the time I reached our house he was ready to do whatever he needed to do to help me.  I explained the situation to him, we put together a box full of towels, and he called the vet.

As we drove his truck around to where the dog lay in the field, I noticed that, while the dog’s canine companion had finally left the scene (never to be seen again), John had gone to the dog and was kneeling down next to her.  He was petting her, using soothing words to comfort her, and the dog was looking up at John with that look of trust she’d given me.  John helped my husband load her in the back of the truck and we began our drive to the vet’s.

I rode in the back of the truck with the dog as my husband drove, and sang hymns to her.  As I sang words from one of my favorite hymns from the Christian Science Hymnal– “Everlasting arms of Love are beneathe, around, above” – the dog leaned against my shoulder and looked up at me with an expression of pure love in her blue eyes.

Once we reached the animal clinic, the veterinarian came out to take a look at her.  After checking her over he told us that apparently a bullet had gone through her head, that he’d take care of her over the holiday weekend – keep her warm and hydrated – but that he wasn’t going to give her any medical treatment.  I got the distinct impression that he didn’t think the dog was going to make it.

My husband and I went to my parents’ home for the Christmas weekend, both of us praying that the dog would still be alive when we returned.  For me, praying for her really meant trying to see the dog as God sees her.  I tried to realize the wholeness and completeness of her as an expression of God, an idea of God.  I reasoned that all the dog could experience was the goodness of God – all she could feel is what Love feels, all she could know is what Truth knows, all she could be is the perfect reflection of God.  I tried to recognize the reality of these things for me, too, and for all of God’s creation.

She made it through the weekend, but when we went to pick her up the vet told us that she wasn’t “out of the woods, yet.”    He told us that if she couldn’t eat, drink, or walk on her own in the next few days, we’d need to bring her back and he’d need to put her to sleep.

We brought her home and put her in a big box in our living room, with a bowl of water and soft dog food by her side.  I continued to pray.  In the middle of the night I got up and went out to where she lay in her box.  Impulsively, I bent down and scooped some water from the dish into her mouth.  She swallowed it, and then leaned over and drank a little from the bowl.  I was elated!  Inspired by her reaction to the water, I bent over and grabbed a glob of dog food and threw a little onto her tongue.  She smacked her mouth together, swallowed the food, and leaned over to eat a bit more.  Now I was beyond elated!  She’d accomplished two of the three requirements the vet had made for her!

The next day I took her out for a walk.  She’d take a few steps and then lean against me.  Then she’d take a few more steps and lean.  But she was walking!  We would not be taking her back to the veterinarian.

In the next two weeks her progress was amazing.  By the end of that period she was not only walking, but running and jumping and chasing balls.  Her appetite was healthy.  She was having no problems drinking or eating.

But one of the most amazing parts of this whole Christmas blessing was the relationship that developed between this dog and the man who had shot her.  They became good friends.  The dog, in fact, became the neighborhood mascot.  (And she never again chased anyone’s cows.)

What the dog brought to me, who had, if you recall, been in a deep funk when she entered our lives, was a sense of the true spirit of Christmas – the Christly spirit of forgiveness, hope, faith, love.  She brought me the recognition that nothing, absolutely nothing, is impossible to God.

We named our new dog Christmas because that is what she brought us that year.

Within a few years all those things that I had wondered if I would ever have as part of my life came to me – a teaching job, children, and a home of our own.  It is my belief that our Christmas Dog prepared my heart to be ready for all of those things to enter my life.

(The story of our Christmas dog was first published in the Christian Science Sentinel [“Christmas Is Alive and Well“] in December 1999, and retold in Blessings: Adventures of a Madcap Christian Scientist in 2005. It was later included in The Madcap Christian Scientist’s Christmas Book in 2014. It was also included on the Christian Science Sentinel radio program in December 2000.)

You Are Worthy of Healing

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You are worthy of love.
You are worthy of healing.
You are God’s beautiful child,
the expression of Her Be-ing.
You don’t need to wait
until something in you changes.
Healing is yours right now –
no need to turn any more pages.
-Karen Molenaar Terrell

Note-Perfect

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podcast link: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/karen-molenaar-terrell/episodes/Note-Perfect-e2fo6jm

This morning I woke up with this verse in my head: “He will perfect that which concerneth thee.” I’m pretty sure I was giving myself a Christian Science treatment in my sleep. 😀

I wake enfolded in divine Love’s arms.
Loved, cherished, protected, safe –
a perfect and complete note in Her song.
Father-Mother Creator unfolds the beauty
and harmony of Her symphony –
note-perfect since before time,
and forever and ever. Amen.
And everything that has to do with me,
and everything that’s concerning to me,
is perfected, evolving fearlessly, flawlessly,
ideally.
-Karen Molenaar Terrell


Once Again Time for Shamelessly Plugging My Books in a Rhyme

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T’was four weeks afore Christmas and it was once again time
for shamelessly plugging my goods in a rhyme.
There were books about Dad, and madcap books for you,
books of celebration, and books of poetry, too.

I wrote two books about the drives and adventures I had with my centenarian father, Dee Molenaar, a well-known mountaineer and artist. Are You Taking Me Home Now? Adventures with Dad, and The Second Hundred Years: Further Adventures with Dad can be purchased on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and through any of your favorite bookstores. The books have five stars on Amazon.
In her Amazon review, Heidi writes:
“This is a delightful book and Karen is a gifted writer. She lets us listen in to the conversations she and her 100 year old Dad have on their car trips, which had me laughing and crying. Interspersed are memories of earlier times. Having a relationship with an older person whose body and brain don’t work as well as it used to requires patience, humor and love. As someone else here said, ‘Karen shows us how to do it right.’ I enjoyed reading this very much. I highly recommend this book and will be giving it out for gifts.”

There’s a related book to this series, called Finding the Rainbows: Lessons from Dad and Mom.

My Cosmic Celebration series includes two books: Cosmic Connections: Sharing the Joy and Cosmic Kinship: Celebrating Community. These books can be purchased on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and through your favorite bookstore. They currently have five stars on Amazon.
C Meares writes:
“Cosmic Connections follows the excursions of an extraverted author and photographer who befriends nearly every person who crosses her path. This uplifting read highlights life’s small moments of connection — with strangers, old friends she meets by chance, the hapless, friendly dogs and former students. The author uses brief anecdotes—one or two pages—to show how much goodness permeates life. One entry describes meeting a stranger, only to find out she is the daughter of the minister who married her and her husband (in another part of the state) 30 years before. Her warm writing style and enthusiasm for life is infectious.”

In 2005, I published my first book, Blessings: Adventures of a Madcap Christian Scientist. It currently has 4.5 stars and 45 ratings on Amazon.
VoIP – Dragon User writes:
“OK, after reading the reviews, I thought this might make a nice Christmas present for a friend. When it arrived I decided to ‘peek’ at a few pages, but couldn’t put it down. I finished reading it in one sitting. But how to review the book is a challenge. It leaves you with such a joyful uplifted feeling and one of appreciation and relevance. At first I found myself saying, ‘I want to know this woman’ and after I finished the book I felt I did.

“Karen brings very positive reinforcement into the reader’s experience and the easy flowing style just melts in your mouth like comfort food. I found dozens of instances where I saw a parallel in my own life, that were entertaining and inspirational in a down to earth sort of way.

“I’m wearing a smile having read this and can’t think of a better way to pass an evening than this quick roller-coaster ride through another’s eyes of refreshing gratitude.

“It touched my heart and soul. Highly recommended.”

I now have four books in the Madcap Christian Scientist series – the last one, Looking Forward: More Adventures of the Madcap Christian Scientist was published last spring.

There’s also a fifth book related to the series called The Madcap Christian Scientist’s Christmas book.
In his review for The Madcap Christian Scientist’s Christmas Book, Jeff Chase writes:
“It’s my second Christmas with this book, and I think I’m enjoying it more this year, perhaps because it’s already feeling like a tradition. Karen’s stories, poems, and musings are full of warmth, humor, and love. There’s much to relate to here. I find myself recalling my own Christmas stories from years past. This book is a gem, made for relaxing. Enjoy!”

These Madcap Christian Scientist books can be purchased on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and your favorite bookstore.

I have three books of poetry: A Poem Lives on My Windowsill, The Brush of Angel Wings, and Since Then. These books can all be purchased on Amazon, and through your favorite bookstore.
In her Amazon review of The Brush of Angel Wings, Nikki writes:
“The author of “The Brush of Angel Wings” never fails to disappoint me. The poetry in her latest book causes a wide range of emotions in the reader, from joy to sadness, happiness to grief, humor to acceptance. Every poem is unique, yet the author’s distinct style can be found in each one. I enjoyed seeing glimpses of the author’s life through her poetry. I can’t wait for her next book to be released.”

I also published a book about 2020. 2020 seemed to me to deserve a book all of its own. That book is titled Scrapbook of a Year and a Day: January 19, 2020 to January 20, 2021.
In her Goodreads review, Maryjmetz writes:

“Karen Molenaar Terrell’s Scrapbook of a Year and a Day is, essentially, a compilation of Facebook posts written between January 19, 2020 and January 20, 2021. If I were to collect my FB posts, it would be very, very dull indeed, but Karen eliminated the silly cat videos, if she ever posted any, and has instead put together a moving and coherent account of the tumultuous year we all lived through and her personal experience of the year following the death of her father, Dee Molenaar. What I particularly love about Karen–and this book–is her perspective on things and her constant striving to live up to her ideals.

“I’m really not a dog-earrer–I find it a vile habit–and yet I folded down the corners on several pages.”

***

Thank you for letting me shamelessly plug here. It brings me such joy to connect with others through my writing.
– Karen Molenaar Terrell

Dolphin Ring

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podcast link: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/karen-molenaar-terrell/episodes/The-Dolphin-Ring-e2fo8ma

My oldest son was born 32 years ago next month. The moment I became a mother, I changed profoundly as a human being. Here was a little life that meant more to me than my own life. Here was someone I would die for – without a second’s thought.

I instantly felt connected to every mother in the universe. I hadn’t really noticed babies before I became a mother myself, but when I became a mother I suddenly discovered that there were babies everywhere! I found my motherly instincts coming out with every baby I encountered – I cooed and played peekaboo and never hesitated to hold a baby other parents handed to me when their hands were full.

Becoming a mother changed who I was as a teacher, too. Now when I looked at my students’ faces I could see them as their mothers saw them. In fact, after I became a mother I found it easier to see EVERYone as their moms might see them. It opened up a whole ‘nother world to me – a world where I better understood my connection to everyone on this planet.

Five months after I birthed my oldest son, I celebrated my first Mother’s Day as a new mom. My own mom sent me $50 for that Mother’s Day. I wanted to buy something special with that money – something that I could keep forever to remember my mom, and to celebrate my own motherhood.

I went to our local mall – at that time our mall was a lively, busy place, filled with big department stores and little kiosks. At one of the kiosks I found a silver ring that depicted two dolphins swimming alongside each other. In my mind I saw a mother dolphin swimming alongside her baby dolphin – protecting and guiding him. That ring seemed perfect for Mother’s Day!

I loved that ring and what it represented for me, but at some point – I can’t remember exactly when now – it got put in a jewelry box with other rings and I lost track of it.

And this month I found it again! I put it on – and discovered another cool thing about this ring: although my fingers are no longer size 4, the ring bends to fit my fingers – it adapts to who I am now.

When I put on my dolphin ring, I remembered my mom’s gift to me that first Mother’s Day. I pictured her sweet face smiling at me. I could hear her voice. I told her that I understand now – I understand things I didn’t understand 32 years ago. I understand her sacrifices. I understand how much I took her love and support for granted. I understand the joy she must have felt when she became a grandma, and I understand now how it feels when your children fly from the nest to make their own lives – the pride when they unfold their wings and take to the air, and the closing of a chapter as they become specks on the horizon in their flight.

When I was a young mother I embraced the sacrifices that a young mother makes. But now I understand the sacrifices a mother with grown children makes – and they are just as real and just as noble. I didn’t appreciate what Mom sacrificed as we grew up and made our own lives. She never asked for more time with us – she knew we were busy – but I remember that Christmas Eve night when I showed up at Mom and Dad’s house unannounced and I remember the look of joy on my mom’s face when she came down the hallway and saw me sitting at her table. I’m so grateful now that I gave her that Christmas Eve night. I wish I had been able to give her more.

My dolphin ring links me between two generations – links me between my mom and my sons. And I’m so grateful for all of the love this ring represents.

A Smile from the Cosmos

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Up in the middle of the night.
Battling fears. Battling dismay.
Something catches the corner
of my eye – I look outside to see
a little star sparkling at me –
flashing red to blue –
above all my fears
above my dismay –
a reassuring light in the darkness.
A promise. A smile from the Cosmos.
“You are my precious child.”
-Karen Molenaar Terrell

podcast link: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/karen-molenaar-terrell/episodes/A-Smile-from-the-Cosmos-e2fo93t

Without Love, We Have Nothing

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When I first woke up this morning I was feeling scared and beyond hope for our world. Doomed, you know? And then something happened – something changed in my thoughts. I’m sitting here, trying to trace back what caused the change, and I’m not sure, exactly.

Maybe it was learning in the first post I saw on Facebook this morning that a friend who’s been trying for years to get pregnant just learned she was expecting. Or maybe I started thinking about how my friend, Janie, and her husband, showed up at my doorstep last night with cookies. Or maybe I was thinking about my little granddaughter in Australia. But I suddenly felt Love touching my shoulder and smiling at me, and the hymn “Tender Mercies” came into my thoughts.

I found Lisa Redfern’s version of the song on Youtube, and I’ve been listening to it. So beautiful. So pure.

I feel like the sun is rising in my thoughts – like light is rising over the hills and filling the dark places in my inner landscape. I’m feeling hope.

As long as we can feel love, there’s hope. I know this maybe sounds naive and simplistic – but I know there’s power in Love. I know Love is the only real thing. And as long as we can hang onto it, and live in it, we have everything that really matters. Without love, we have nothing. We can “win wars” and have gazillions of dollars – but without Love, we have nothing.

Actually – that sounds a lot like I Corinthians 13, doesn’t it? “If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.”

And “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”

“Love never fails.”

“And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”

Let’s keep hope. Let’s keep faith. But let’s especially keep love.

***

I awake each morn to a brand new day,
Singing Hallelujah! as I go on my way,
For my heart is fixed on this one guarantee,
The Love that is All holds me tenderly.

Tender mercies, oh, tender mercies,
Tender mercies are holding me.
Tender mercies, oh, tender mercies,
Tender mercies are holding me.

I can walk in Love through the valley of fear,
Singing Hallelujah! when hope is deferred,
The desert of my longings can’t fulfill,
But Love fills all need and bids want be still.

So no matter the need and no matter the threat,
I’m secure in Your love, no fear, no regret.
Can there be a sweeter comfort, a grace more secure,
Than the thought that your Love is lovingly here?
– Susan Mack

Love the Hell Out of the World

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My dear Humoristian hooligans,

Today may you love the hell out of the world. May you open the floodgates of Love and let Love water the weary hearts athirst for kindness and caring. May you refuse to allow fear and hate to steal your hope and courage. May the bigots, bullies, and busybodies be transformed by your open hearts and good will to all. May the stodgy, stuffy, and stingy be transformed by your irrepressible joy. May you bring laughter to those in sorry need of a good laugh, and hope to those ascared of the future.

Go out there and work your magic, my friends!

Karen

New Review for *Looking Forward*

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I just got a new review on Goodreads for Looking Forward: More Adventures of the Madcap Christian Scientist. The reviewer filled my heart with her kindness. I really needed her kindness today. Here’s what H. Benson wrote:

Karen’s message is one of LOVE’s ability to carry us through the ups and downs of daily life as well as support us and provide hope in these crazy times when the world seems to have gone mad.

I’ve had the pleasure of reading 3 of Karen Molenaar Terrell’s books, the most recent being “Looking Forward,” which I’ve read twice in the past couple of months. It provides solace to the soul as you read of the kindness, love, humor, and compassion that infuses Karen’s life and daily activities with aging parents, husband, adult sons, extended family, pets, and community. She shares about her life with such openness and vulnerability that when you’ve finished reading, you feel like you’ve thoroughly enjoyed catching up with your best friend and you’re looking forward to your next get-together.

All teachers should read Karen’s chapter on education. The country and the world would be a far better place if teachers shared Karen’s perspective on students and incorporated her creative ways of sharing academic lessons and life’s wisdom with students.

Karen’s political campaign gives the reader a taste of how our country’s leaders could and should be: intelligent, passionate, respectful, articulate and kind. How we sorely need that in this world!

The quotations and book references with which Karen begins each chapter have been added to my reading list. If they inspired Karen, they are sure to inspire me.

This “Madcap Christian Scientist” has a heartfelt and hopeful message for all of us: LOVE and a sense of humor are the keys to a fulfilling life.

“And Loss Is Gain”

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podcast link: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/karen-molenaar-terrell/episodes/And-Loss-Is-Gain-e2fof90

A “short” I wrote entitled “No Separation in Love” appears in November’s Christian Science Journal. (An audio recording of the article is available, too.)

In my newest book, Looking Forward: More Adventures of the Madcap Christian Scientist, I talk more about my experience with loss in the chapter titled “And Loss Is Gain.” I think that chapter dovetails really well with the short in the Journal. There are details you’ll find in the Journal article that you won’t find in my book, and there are details in my chapter you won’t find in the Journal article.

Here’s the chapter from my book:

“And Loss Is Gain”

“O make me glad for every scalding tear,
For hope deferred, ingratitude, disdain!
Wait, and love more for every hate, and fear
No ill, — since God is good, and loss is gain.”
– Mary Baker Eddy, “Mother’s Evening Prayer”

When I learned Andrew and Christina might be moving to, literally, the other side of the world, I went through a period of deep mourning. It felt like someone I loved had died – like another huge loss in a long series of huge losses.

And then I started pulling together all the tools I had been collecting over the years – the insights and healings and epiphanies – and I constructed a bridge for myself over the deep mourning.

I remembered the dream I’d had when the sons had first started moving out of the house and creating their own lives: In the dream I was in some building that just went on forever. I was walking in a leisurely pace from room to room, and periodically this voice would ask, “Karen, do you want to turn around or not?” I’d grin like it was a joke, and just keep moving forward. I didn’t want to turn around. I didn’t want to go back. I didn’t want to be like Lot’s wife in the Bible, who turned around and became a pillar of salt – fixed in time. I didn’t want to yearn for what WAS, but I wanted to look forward to what was to come.

And then I remembered the time when my youngest son showed me yet another tattoo he’d had etched on himself, and I’d felt so grieved that he was covering his beautiful skin with these permanent etchings that I’d reached my thoughts out to God for help. The voice of Love had immediately answered my prayers with these words, “Xander doesn’t belong to you. He belongs to himself and he belongs to Me. What he does with his body and his life is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS. Xander is fine, and will always be fine. And so are you.” I’d immediately felt the fears and grief lift from me. And when, the next day, Xander showed me the new tattoos on his knuckles, I found myself saying to him, “Oh! Those are cool! What do they mean?” He’d looked a little surprised by my reaction, and then he’d gone through and told me what each tattoo meant – the pine tree represented the Pacific Northwest; the top hat and smiley face represented humor; the mountain range represented our family heritage; the feather represented freedom; and the crown represented purpose. Isn’t that beautiful?

Another tool I pulled out was the memory of a time when my family was scattered out across the United States – I was in Chicago for my Christian Science Association, Andrew was living in Los Angeles, Xander and Scott were in Washington State – and I had a sort of revelation. Did our physical separation in any way weaken my love for my family? Did the fact that we weren’t in close physical proximity in any way make me love my sons and husband less? The answer, of course, was no. And then I thought about the loved ones who have died through the years and realized that death hasn’t stopped me from loving them, either. It became clear to me that NOTHING can separate us from the love we have for each other.

One morning, a couple of weeks after I’d learned of Andrew and Christina’s possible move, I woke up feeling full of joy. I walked out and stood on our back deck in the sunshine, breathed in the morning air, and listened to the birdsong. The thought came to me that something amazing is coming. I realized that not only does God have wonderful plans for Andrew and Christina, and Xander and Kyla, but She has wonderful plans for me, too.

-Karen Molenaar Terrell

My new grandbaby and me getting acquainted.