Tag Archives: Dee Molenaar

A Message from the New Owners

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Love inspires, illumines, designates, and leads the way.
– Mary Bakery Eddy

Divine Love always has met and always will meet every human need.
– Mary Baker Eddy

My parents had lived in this house, and on this land, for 48 years. They’d planted and nurtured trees, kept the local birds supplied with a steady stream of bird feed, Dad had painted a mural on the garage, and Mom had planted a rose garden. Now it was time for Dad (97 then) and Moz (87 then) to transition into a new chapter in their lives. It was time for them to leave the old homestead and leave it in the hands of new owners.

When my husband, brothers, and I looked at what needed to be accomplished in the next few months it was over-whelming. Daunting. It looked to be impossible.

There was 48 years of accumulated life to sort through – mountains of books, artwork, correspondence, journals, music, photos, mountaineering paraphernalia. As a well-known mountain-climber my dad has led an extraordinarily rich life, hobnobbed with celebrities, traveled around the world – we couldn’t just throw stuff in the dumpster willy-nilly – there might be a letter from Bobby Kennedy or Edmund Hillary hidden in the flotsam and jetsam, or a National Geographic with Dad’s picture in it. And there was so much! Three stories filled with memories.

Also – a new home needed to be found for our parents, and their old home needed to be sold. We worried: Would we be able to sell the parents’ old home in time to pay for their new home? And would we find new owners who would appreciate the homestead, and care for it, and love it the way my parents had?

I threw out our hopes and needs to God, Love, and trusted that the power of Good in which I believe would direct us and open the way. Nothing, I told myself, is impossible to Love. Nothing is beyond the reach of Love. Love would provide.

I invited two of Dad’s friends to come over and sort through books and artwork for us – to help us know what was important and needed to be kept safe and what could be donated to the Goodwill. Then my siblings and I each pledged to tackle a different floor in the house – my husband and I took the main floor, my brothers took on the attic and basement.

My husband and I gave ourselves one day to empty the first floor, and dust, sweep, vacuum, and mop it. We got there at 8:00 in the morning. About 2:00 I was exhausted and ready to give up. My husband said, matter-of-factly, “We can’t. We don’t have a choice. We’ve got to get it done.” And then he picked up a mop and disappeared. He was a huge inspiration to me that day. I couldn’t have done what I needed to do without his calm, steady, can-do attitude. At 7:00 pm – 11 hours after we’d started – we were done. It felt like I’d just summited Mount Rainier – I had that same feeling of happy accomplishment.

My mom had given me the name and number of a real estate agent, and when I called, she agreed to take us on. We couldn’t have found a more perfect person to work with us! She was kind and patient – never pushed my parents to do what they weren’t ready to do and always put their needs and wishes first.

Two weeks after putting my parents’ home on the market, it had new owners. I teared up when I read the note they sent to Mom and Dad:

Dear Dee and Colleen,

We just want to thank you both so much for choosing us to inherit this property. We fell in love with it right away. It’s our dream house. We promise to respect it and keep the spirit of love alive here. We appreciate the spirit of adventure and have the utmost respect for the incredible things you’ve done. What a beautiful life!

Dee, your art is gorgeous. We will forever treasure the mural on the garage. Colleen, we will continue to nurture the birds you’ve brought to the property. It was magical to see so many, and of such variety, during our short chat on the porch.

On a more practical note, PLEASE don’t worry about cleaning the place out. Anything you need to leave is fine. We will take care of it. It must be bittersweet to be moving on to a new chapter of life and we are in no way wanting you to feel pressured.

Of course, you are welcome any time. Thanks again. We’re pinching ourselves with the good luck of finding this home!

With love,

Chris and Janel

My parents’ old home was meant to belong Chris and Janel. They were meant to live there now. You know that old saying “What blesses one, blesses all”?  This is a perfect example of that.

My parents got full price for their old home and were able to move into a retirement community, and, more recently, closer to me – in an artsy, active little town where they can take walks along the water and visit art galleries, and get the services they need for this new chapter in their lives.

***

I recently called Janel to find out if I could use her letter in my new book, Finding the Rainbows: Lessons from Dad and Mom. She cheerfully gave me permission, and then told me how much her young family is enjoying their new home. Oh man, that just warmed the cockles of my heart. Blessings all around.

Love is good.

Dad and his mural

Dee Molenaar and the mural on his old garage.

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God (Love), to them who are the called according to his purpose.
– Romans 8:28

“Just Farting Around”

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Brought Moz and Dad (98) over today to watch The Sound of Music and to give Dad a chance to watercolor on my dining room table. I told him on the drive over that this time it was just for him – he wasn’t going to be painting for anyone else. So I brought in his paints, set out his watercolor paper, and went into the family room to start The Sound of Music for Moz – and by the time I got back to Dad he’d already started painting! I asked him what he was painting, and he said he was “just farting around.” I watched him for a bit, as a mountain emerged on his paper, and I asked him what mountain he was painting there, and he said, “It could be any mountain.”

He didn’t finish today. After he’d laid down the background and a few trees he went in and watched The Sound of Music with Moz. I told him I was going to bring him back sometime soon to work some more on his painting, and he nodded his head and said, “Okay.” I told him I’d keep his paints here because this is a nice quiet place for him to work, and he won’t have a lot of interruptions here, and he said, “Yeah. That’s good.”

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Dad Painting

“I think I can make something up.”

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The LaConner Retirement Inn in LaConner, Washington, asked its residents to make paintings for an auction to help those dealing with Alzheimers. (For anyone interested in attending, the auction will be this Saturday, July 23rd at the LaConner Retirement Inn.)

Yesterday I “kidnapped” Dad, 98, and Moz and brought them to my place to give Dad a quiet space and a big table to work on his painting for the auction. I told Dad that he was painting for his dinner. 🙂 He nodded his head and said “Okay.”

I’d brought to my house some of Dad’s brushes, a sponge, a packet of watercolor paper, and a couple of watercolor trays I found in his apartment. Dad’s favorite brush wasn’t in the brushes I’d brought over – but he found one that would be “alright.” There was also no yellow in the watercolor trays. But my youngest son had left some of his art supplies here when he moved out, so I rummaged through his art box and found a little travel watercolor box that had a small square of yellow in it, and Dad made do with that.

Dad worked really hard. Painting takes a lot of concentration. There are problems to be solved – balancing out this area with THAT area; making the foreground darker to bring depth and dimension to the background; finding the just right color to brighten everything up.

Dad and Mom were at my place from about 3:00 to 7:30 – and, except for a small break for dinner, and a short nap, Dad spent that entire time working on his picture. And look! He got ‘er done! I’m really proud of him.

Dad: “What should I paint?”
Me: “Mount Rainier. Do you need a picture to help you?”
Dad: (understatement of the century – this man has been painting Rainier for more than 70 years) “Oh, no. I think I can make something up.”
An hour later-
Dad: “I haven’t painted in a long time.”
Me: “How does it feel?”
Dad: “I like it!”
Three hours later –
Me: “Painting is hard work!”
Dad: “It’s mind work.”

Dee Molenaar painting
Dee Molenaar painting
Dee Molenaar painting
Dee Molenaar
Dee Molenaar
Dee Molenaar
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Mount Rainier by Dee Molenaar

A Rainbow of Book Covers

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Just published my latest book, Finding the Rainbows: Lessons from Dad and Mom. It shares some of the adventures my mom (88) and dad (98) have had in the last year – moving out of their home of 48 years, and into a new chapter of their lives. My parents rock! They are brave, and kind, and are expert at adjusting to the ups and downs of Life.

On another note: A year or two ago I mentioned to friends that it would be pretty cool if I could make a kind of rainbow of all my book covers. Check it out! 🙂

book covers 2016

Finding Agreeable Things

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Serendipity: the faculty or phenomenon of finding valuable or agreeable things not sought for…
– Merriam-Webster

I love when serendipity happens.

Last week there was a luncheon in Tacoma to honor folks who have been members of the Mountaineers for more than 25 years. Dad has been a member of the Mountaineers for more than 70 years and we thought it would be cool if he could attend this event. But Tacoma is two hours to the south of us and Dad no longer drives – so Scott took the day off, and he and I escorted Dad to the luncheon.

Mom wanted to come, too, but decided it would be too difficult to make the journey right now. I was concerned about leaving her alone, but she assured me she’d be fine – she had plans to go for a walk with one of her friends and then she planned on spending a quiet day with the cats.

Mom got Dad all polished and ready to go and the two of them were waiting for us outside their retirement home when we arrived. We loaded Dad and his walker into the car and off we went on our grand adventure, waving good bye to Mom as she stood on the sidewalk, blowing us kisses.

***

A film-maker named Nils contacted me a couple weeks ago to tell me he was making a documentary on Mount Rainier, and wondering if he could somehow include a clip of Dad in the documentary. I suggested to him that he meet us at the Mountaineer clubhouse before the luncheon, and get a clip of Dad then, and he thought this was a fine idea. When we arrived at the clubhouse Nils was there with his cameraman, Eric, and they’d already talked to the other Mountaineers members and had invited them to be included in the clip with Dad. It was great! There was Dad – front and center – surrounded by friends he’s known for decades, hugging and shaking hands and re-connecting. And yodeling. All captured on camera for future generations.

***

When we got into the clubhouse I turned around and there was our friend, Perky – a woman we’d climbed Rainier with 40 years ago – standing in front of me with a big grin on her face. Perky had wanted to come to Dad’s 98th birthday party the Saturday before, but hadn’t been able to make it. But today – in a city two hours to the south of where the party had been – Perky happened to glance over at the Mountaineers clubhouse while she was driving through town, and saw me standing on the sidewalk! Perky said she’d been planning to leave earlier for her drive, but something had delayed her – and now she realized she’d been MEANT to leave her home and pass in front of the Mountaineers clubhouse at the exact moment she did.

I love when serendipity happens.

***

It was nice meeting Dad’s old chums. There was Helen – who’d been a member of the Mountaineers for 60-some years. Helen asked about Mom and told me to give Mom her love. There was Geoff, the president of the Mountaineers – who told me to give Mom a hug and said Mom is one of the sweetest, most even-tempered people he’s ever met. There was Mary – who gave Dad a big hug, and told me she loves Mom and wants to come up and visit her soon.

By this time I’d come to realize Mom is as much a part of the Mountaineers as Dad is – and that her presence is hugely missed when she’s not there.

***

Sitting at our table was another gentleman who looked like he might be about Dad’s age. Dad and he got into conversation about their birth years. “I was born in September, 1918,” Worth Gurley told Pop. Pop’s eyes crinkled up in delight at finding another chap of the same vintage – and he told Worth he was born in 1918, too! Dad told Worth that he’d been born in Los Angeles, and Worth, as it turns out, had also been born in Los Angeles! Soon the two were involved in lively conversation with each other, proving that it is never too late to make a new friend.

I looked around and found the woman who had brought Worth to the luncheon. I asked if she was Worth’s daughter, and she affirmed she was. Heather and I both turned to watch our dads conversing with each other – their hands cupping their ears to hear each other better – and smiled at the enjoyment we could see on their faces. Heather and I exchanged some of the details of our lives. It turns out she lives in Bellingham – only 20 minutes to the north of where I live! (Have I mentioned that I love when serendipity happens?) She said she has routinely been making the trek to Tacoma to help her father – just as I did until my parents moved up near me a couple months ago. Heather and I exchanged email addresses, with hopes that we’ll be able to get together for a walk on the Bellingham boardwalk with our dads someday soon.

We all had a wonderful time at the luncheon.

***

When we got back to Mom and Dad’s retirement place I let Mom know about all the well wishes and hugs that had been sent her way, and she smiled up at me and nodded her head. I asked her how her day had been. She said she’d been feeling lonely for Dad, but then she turned on the television and there was a movie with one of their favorite actors – Nelson Eddy! (I love when serendipity happens.) That movie cheered her all up. “Nelson Eddy was fighting for workers’ rights in this movie – he put out a newspaper called The Wasp which showed all the corruption that was going on – and they (the bad guys) were trying to find out who was putting out this paper!” she said, all excited. “And he sang! He has such a beautiful voice!”

I asked if the good guys had won in this movie, and she said, “Of course!”

And that’s the thing, you know: We would appear to be living, right now, in troubling times – there’s corruption in politics and business; there are threats to our safety and well-being; there seem to be a lot of “bad guys” out to get us. But there is nothing we aren’t experiencing right now that my parents haven’t already experienced before in some form – they’ve seen it all. They’ve also lived long enough and seen enough to know that there’s always hope. They’ve lived long enough to see good win, in the end. They’ve lived long enough to experience a lot of serendipity in their lives.

Through many years my parents have developed the “faculty of finding… valuable or agreeable things not sought for.” Perhaps that is why they have lived such long and full lives. They are open to whatever good comes their way, and they recognize it when they see it. They appreciate all the simple, beautiful, joyous moments that have filled their lives, and know how to be grateful for them.

When you look at Life in that way – expecting to find “valuable or agreeable things” every moment – every day is a treasure-packed adventure, isn’t it?

Dee Molenaar and his friends from the Tacoma Mountaineers.
Helen and Dad
Dad and Perky

 

 

 

Serendipity on the Fourth of July

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‘You have to love a nation that celebrates its independence every July 4th, not with a parade of guns, tanks, and soldiers who file by the White House in a show of strength and muscle, but with family picnics where kids throw Frisbees, the potato salad gets iffy, and the flies die from happiness. You may think you have overeaten, but it is patriotism.’
~Erma Bombeck

We parked near the wood-carving lot when we got to Sedro-Woolley for the Fourth of July footrace. I wandered through the lot, looking at the art, and when I came out the other side of the lot I was facing the Woolley Market. I’d never been in there before, but I hadn’t had breakfast, yet, and this seemed like a good time to check it out and try to rustle myself up something to eat.

When I walked in I glanced up at the wall and saw one of Dad’s paintings hanging in there! Then I knew I was in the place that a former colleague had been telling me about – I could smell mountain climbing gear and clothing in there (I’m thinking my fellow mountain people will understand what I mean by that). Above Dad’s painting, I could see a loft of some kind. I went up there to investigate and found three or four folks getting ready for a climb of Mount Baker. I managed to track down Craig, the man who runs the guiding operation out of the loft, and… long story a little shorter – it turns out Craig and my dad are old friends!  Craig hails from Gig Harbor – near where my parents USED to live – but now they both live in Skagit County – about two and half hours to the north. Craig has been in Skagit County awhile, but Dad and Mom just moved here two months ago. I told Craig that I thought my Dad would really like to see him, and I’d try to bring him over before the day was out.

Later, when I asked Dad (who just turned 98) if he remembered Craig, his whole face lit up. Yes, he said, he would really like to see Craig again.

And so he did.

It was an AWESOME Fourth of July.

Dad Karen Craig Van Hooy

Sedro-Woolley
The Woolley Market
Dad’s painting on the wall

Dad Turns 98 Today!

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Live! Live the wonderful life that is in you. Be afraid of nothing. There is so little time that your youth will last – such a little time.
– Richard Halliburton

God expresses in man the infinite idea forever developing itself, broadening and rising higher and higher from a boundless basis.
– Mary Baker Eddy

Dad turns 98 today. A couple months ago he thought he’d be turning 100 today. A month ago he thought he’d be turning 97. We finally got it all sorted out when I reminded him that he was born in 1918 and that it is now 2016. I saw him do the calculations in his head. A few minutes later we were sitting at the dining room table with my mom and husband, when Dad announced, kind of shocked, “I’m going to be 98 in a month! I never thought I’d make it to 98.” Later he told me that 98 sounds a lot older than 100. Apparently he just skipped over 98 and 99 and went right from 97 to 100 when he’d been trying to figure out his age.

Think about this: When Dad was born women didn’t have the right to vote, yet. Radios, telephones, and cars had just been invented. There were no CDs, televisions, cellphones, or computers. There was no internet. There was no Google. There was no Wikipedia. To find information people often went to the library and did research in these things called books – and sometimes the research might take days or even weeks! (Today if you want to find out more about Dad, all you’ve got to do is go to his Wikipedia page – et voila! There he is!)

People also read those things called books just for fun. The book that Dad has said most influenced him was a book called The Rolling Road to Romance by an adventurer named Richard Halliburton. Halliburton exonerated his readers to “Live! Live the wonderful life that is in you. Be afraid of nothing. There is so little time that your youth will last – such a little time.”

Dad took those words to heart.

Dad was born at the end of World War I. He survived The Great Depression with his family, served in World War II, has climbed on the highest mountains on earth, went to the South Pole, and close to the North Pole, has been on six of the seven continents, has moved easily among world leaders, and traveled the world with a close group of fellow adventurers and explorers. At various times he’s worked as a photographer, cartographer, geologist, hydrologist, artist, mountain guide, ski instructor, and author. He’s moved through life with no sense of limitation about what he might accomplish or where he might go or who he might meet, and that – what I guess some might call “naïve” – sense of freedom has served him well in his life.

And today he turns 98. He’s still engaged in his life – still enjoys exploring the nooks and crannies of Life’s highways and by-ways. He continues to live “the wonderful life” that is in him.

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Dee Molenaar

 

An Unremarkable and Sweet Exchange

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Okay, to be honest, I debated whether I should share this moment or not. In a way, it seems almost silly for me to share it – because it SHOULD be just a matter-of-fact thing – a “no big deal” thing, really – but… after some other news I’ve heard tonight, I’m feeling impelled to put this out there…

So I’d helped my dad out of the car, and was helping my mom out, when I heard Dad say, “Thank you!” to someone who was opening the door to the apartment building for him. I looked to see what was going on back there, and saw that these two young black men with Seahawks hoodies were holding the door for Dad so he could maneuver his walker into the building. Dad nodded to the young men, and smiled, and thanked them again as I watched him go through the doors, and the young men smiled back and said, “You’re welcome!” and then went on their way. It was a small, insignificant moment, really. But… and I can’t even explain why… I find myself getting teary-eyed as I sit here recalling that simple, unremarkable, sweet exchange between a 97 year-old white man, and those two young men in the hoodies.

You know, there are a lot of really good people in this world who want to do right by each other. There is hope for us.

 

earth 2

Head for the Rainbows

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Another lesson from a visit with the folks’: I take Moz and Dad to a little bar and grill on Pearl Street – great food, but maybe not the best ambiance. Dad is sitting across from me, and he is not pleased. He whispers, “Why would we eat here when we can go down the hill a couple blocks and eat lunch on the waterfront?” This is a good question. So we gather up the cane and walker, get back in the car, and head down past the Point Defiance ferry to Anthony’s Restaurant. When we arrive we see a rainbow arching over the Puget Sound – a rainbow we’d have missed if we’d stayed in the other place. As soon as we sit down at our table a torrential downpour falls from the sky. We are sitting all cozy and comfortable and warm inside, while the deluge pounds against the deck outside. And when the rain stops – a DOUBLE rainbow appears over the Sound. Yup, Dad was right. Again. 🙂

If you’re going to take the trouble to go out for lunch, you might as well head for the rainbows, right?

Double Rainbows at Point Defiance

Double Rainbows at Point Defiance

“I need to paint again.”

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Every good painter paints what he is. – Jackson Pollock

Dad turned 97 at the end of June, and he and Mom (87) moved into a new home in a retirement community the next week. I’ve been so proud of the way they’ve forged ahead into this new adventure.

Last weekend I helped them unpack and unbox things in their new apartment – hung up pictures on the wall, cleared off the desk so Mom has a place to get organized, and cleared off the dining room table for Dad – showed him the box I’d packed for him full of watercolor paints, brushes, pencils. He said, “I need to paint again.” And then he filled up a cup with water, picked the brush he wanted, and THIS happened… 🙂